I continued to actively ignore Damien, and he didn't try to reach out to me since then. I ended up bunking with Ramos who's roommate was still at home, this way I didn't have to subject myself to the awkwardness with Damien.
I just explained to Ramos that Damien has been off lately, he understood it as me being afraid Damien was about to snap on me and beat me to a pulp. That's what you'd think, I don't think anybody would realize me and him had formed a not so platonic friendship. I knew sooner or later id have to talk to Damien again but the way I blew up on him last time actually made me feel embarrassed to see him again. I let my emotions spill out, I probably looked pathetic to him.
I sat behind the school cafeteria wanting to eat alone. It had been two days since we had the argument and it's just been causing me to be down in the dumps. I poked my food, not wanting to eat- honestly the lunch was always good I just didn't have an appetite.
"Can I join you" came a voice that I knew well but didn't recognize at first, being to entranced in my own thoughts.
"Yea I gue-" I said looking towards the man who sat next to me and my eyes widened and I scooted away when I saw it was Damien. What is he going to apologize?
"Stop sleeping away from me, you don't have to talk to me but I need to see you, even when your sleeping" he grumbled leaning in near me, getting close to my face causing me to blush- I leaned back in response.
"That's all you have to say? What are you THAT jealous" I bit out, sounding annoyed. It made me semi happy that he wanted me near him but I'd rather him say something meaningful.
"I am. And you know it." He was serious and grabbed my hand to kiss my knuckles and I almost melted but snatched my hand back. Don't give in! Stay mad, stay upset, he's trying to manipulate you! With his puppy dog antics!
"Ok anything else? If not you can leave" I muttered, folding my arms to hide my hands. He did a heavy a sigh and I could see him clench his teeth as if he was frustrated.
"Listen I'm not using you, or whatever you think. I just want what's best for you, I don't think you should be involved. I don't want you involved" he said seriously and scoffed; he's so stubborn.
"That's not your choice, it's mine. I'm not some innocent kid, you don't know anything about me. Just like how I don't know anything about you, so I guess we're even." I retorted and he gripped my thigh tight, tight enough I almost yelped. I could see him visibly getting angry.
"I do know you, I know you like collecting vinyls and old music, I know your a huge nerd who doesn't like to show it, I've learned you lick your lips when you lie and that you like to lay on my bed when I'm not there" he ranted at me and I turned beet red at the last part, he knows ?! How did he know? I was surprised that he was actually observant of me, I felt butterflies in my stomach knowing that he actually paid me attention.
"T-that's not what I mean, you don't know what I did before coming here-" I explained and he looked me in my eyes and had me entranced, as if he placed a spell on me- a truth spell because I was about to spill my guts out. I never wanted him to know, who wants a boyfriend who has a screw loose you know? But seeing as Damien has a bad temper maybe he won't mind...
"Then tell me." He replied and I gulped loud, I gripped my shirt as I felt like I had dug my own grave. I bit my cheek wondering why I even brought it up. I can't bitch at him for keeping secrets if I do too.
"Listen... at my old school I ended up being lead on by some guy I liked, I did the stupid mistake of confessing and from then on I was bullied on a daily basis. They wrote slurs on my locker and my desk, beat me up behind the school and at gym just your typical bully stuff " I muttered, and Damien sat there quietly- a little too still.
"But One day they took it too far, we were in the bathroom, and I remember it well. They said 'I heard gay guys are easy?' And started holding me down" I whispered it partly, I remember being terrified, I should've know they were just joking around but I just knew that if I didn't stop them they'd go to far. I had started bringing a knife ever since I started getting beat up just Incase- I never thought I'd use it.
"One thing led to another, and I ended up stabbing the kid multiple times. I had kept a pocket knife on me for safety reasons but I almost killed the kid, I went to jail for it. It's the reason why I'm here, why my father decided to take me back." I explained and Damien seemed to be in shock, but I could see behind his eyes the anger that started to fester.
"They tried to... touch you? They deserve to die, you didn't do anything wrong, I'll kill them myself" he gritted out, his grip on my thigh hurt, I don't think he realized it till I placed my hand over his and he softened.
"Your right, I didn't do anything wrong. The bastard deserved it and deep down I wish he had died. They made torturing me their goal, he should've felt what I felt." I replied calmly, I laced my fingers with his. I felt at peace, a lot better now that I had let out all the pent up anger In me. Damien was my safe place, despite how angry he made me I couldn't help but feel at peace.
"The issue was, that when I stabbed him I didn't stop until somebody forced me off of him. It was like I was possessed by something, I wanted to cause harm, at some point it stopped being self defense." I explained, that was the problem. I enjoyed it more then I should have, it wasn't normal and I knew that. But now that I know my father deals with things in that nature, I feel less like a freak.
"I understand that thrill, I get what you mean but I still don't want you experience anything like that ever again, I don't want anybody to touch you, I'll kill anybody that does. And in this line of work that is all that ever happens" He said leaning closer to me, and I could hear my heartbeat clear as day as it rang in my ears.
"If you don't want me to get hurt, Then don't leave my side" I whispered and I was met with his warm lips on mine as he pushed me back into the grass, my arms wrapped around his head deepening the kiss. He pressed himself against me and I grew conscious about just what area he was pressing into. Our tongues fought and twirled against each other- I could barely keep up. I finally had to break it so I could breath.
"You understand now right, I can handle it more then you think" I breathed out, already exhausted from his assault on my mouth. He pressed his forehead against mine with a grimace.
"Yea but I still don't like it. But.... I'll tolerate it, I'll just have to never let you go is all" he muttered and kissed my cheek and I frowned, he is so stubborn! But this is the best I'll get I suppose. We continued to fool around, i felt like I was being eaten alive the way Damien was nipping and sucking at my skin, it was like he was starving. His hands started to go down south and that's when I decided to stop him.
Even if I do want to continue with him, I'd rather not do it on the grass. Outside. In public.
"How about we continue this later, in our own rooms" I said covering his mouth to stop him from kissing me. He just kissed my palm instead and looked disappointed.
"You promise." He said seriously his eyes resembling a predator the way he stared me down.
"Of course" I said uneasy, but was I really ready? Was I ready for Damien's intensity?!
••••
Quick and small sorry guys it's been a while. I'm trying hard to get these chapters up and going!
Thank you everyone who's commented I didn't expect this book to even get attention! 1.9k views doesn't seem like a lot but it is to me!! I started this book I think two years ago? I had almost given up on it, so you guys really gave me the drive to keep going!! I thought this story would be to cheesy and cliche but I enjoys those so sorry 😅
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Onyx Blues (Completed)
Romance(THIS IS A MAFIA STORY) Onyx Smit was living with his uncle until he royally messed up. Forced to be placed in the care of his real father, he was shipped off to a boarding school; a well known school known for the students from elite families. Due...
