cold | junhao

十一

The sun is shining brightly the next morning - finally resembling what you'd expect from summer instead of feeling like the harsh beginnings of winter. Jun isn't planning on meeting Minghao today - for the first time since they met - and he wanders down to the harbour early on in the morning, revelling in the blissful solitude accompanied by sounds of waves crashing against the shore.

He'd agreed to meet up with Mingyu for the morning, to hang out like they used to and have a chance at feeling like teenagers again. Since Jun's job got more demanding and Mingyu started working for his father, they haven't gotten the chance.

Despite it still being early, there's a few people around: mothers walking their children to school; teenagers like him getting a few minutes of freedom before being stuck in a classroom all day; and a few people who work in the shops along the boardwalk - all hustling round their doors getting ready to open for the day.

Occasionally, Jun is keenly aware of glances at him from over shoulders, or lingering gazes which make the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. They don't surprise or worry him anymore - they became a regular thing after he modelled for an increasingly popular fashion designer a few months ago, and as a result became somewhat well-known.

It doesn't mean he likes it, though. 

There's an added pressure as Jun knows he's being watched wherever he goes, and will be judged if he's not looking his best at all times. Everyone seems to know him, and God he wishes they didn't.

Maybe that's why he grew fond of Xu Minghao so quickly, because he didn't know him.

Leaning against the wall that acts as the only barrier between him and the plunging depths of the ocean, Jun tips his head back, basking in the warm sun. He came early on purpose, and Mingyu isn't coming until after driving Wonwoo to work. Otherwise, they probably would've just walked together, seeing as Jun and Mingyu literally live across the corridor from each other. 

Then, his phone vibrates in his pocket. It's a text, from Mingyu.

string bean
hey i don't think i can make it
wonwoo's really ill
sorry

A sigh escapes him, and Jun quickly texts back saying it's okay and shuts his phone off again. Great. See, if Jun was a good friend, he would probably be on his way to actually see Wonwoo right now - to check up on him and bring food or something.

"He's the director of a fucking hospital, I'm pretty sure he can check up on himself." Jun doesn't always feel like being a good friend. Sometimes he's just a friend. 

He jogs over to where he can see Jeongin opening up the café and calls out to him. The boy turns his head and smiles. "Jun!" he straightens up.

"Do you have anything left over from yesterday? I haven't eaten breakfast and I'm starving." Jun uses his hand to shade his eyes from the sun while Jeongin frowns to himself.

"I think so," he says. "Come inside, I'll look for you." 

In the end, Jeongin finds a cheese and ham toastie which he heats up for Jun. "Thanks Innie," Jun smiles fondly at the younger boy, who waves enthusiastically behind Jun when he leaves again and adventures back out into the glaring sun, slowly growing brighter as the day grows older. More people are flooding the streets now, which means even more inevitably staring his way. Jun ducks his head and jogs through the crowd, just hoping that his hat covers his face enough.

Shoulders bump into him, the blur of voices around him penetrate his ears and drown him, almost making Jun's legs buckle and fall from underneath him. He allows himself to stop - just for a moment - to make sure he's still breathing before carrying on. The crowd seems never ending, and Jun's wondering how it got so flooded all of a sudden, when he was only in the café for ten minutes.