"but you're tied together with a smile, but you're coming undone."
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LOOKING OUT OVER THE BRIDGE,
finley stood behind it, tapping her fingers against the metal bars.
she was falling apart at the seams, like someone was nitpicking at her every second of the day, and guilt and sadness knawing at her.
she sighed, walking back over to darrys truck and started to drive.
she had walked out earlier that morning, taking the keys and just drove til she had made it to the bridge, and just sat there.
she had taken the leather book and pen that dallas had given her weeks before, and just left without telling anyone.
she soon found herself at the top of jay mountain, and memories flashed back to her.
from days where dallas had taken her up here, showing her a side nobody else would ever see but her, and to the fire of the church.
it was early december, and her depression had gotten worse.
depression was like a hurricane, destroying your mental health, your relationships with people, and everything around you.
and finley was stuck in the eye of it, and she couldn't escape it.
there hadn't been a day since the rumble that her chest hadn't been heavy, that she wasn't filled with guilt and sorrow.
she got out of the truck, grabbing a blanket, her book and pen, heading towards the bed of the truck.
one thing nobody knew- but dallas, about finley wren is that she did poetry, and that was her escape.
so as she sat down on the bed of the truck, she saw her breath within the cold december afternoon.
her hand shook as she wrote down the title 'seventeen' onto the paper.
she let all of her emotions, all of her feelings, all of the trama go into the poem.
she felt tears streaming down her face by the time she had finished, and held back her sobs.
he drew stars around her scars, but they were all bleeding through, and she didn't think it'd ever stop.
she had always worn a signature cardigan, one that was her mother's before she had passed, but even before her mother loved to see her wear it.
she needed him back, she couldn't do any of this without him.
his death destroyed her, and everyone knew it.
she had walked over to the mostly burnt down church, with a glass coke bottle in her hand, and she stood in front of it, with all of the memories of those days coming back to her.
she had been with dallas that night but went with johnny and pony to make sure they were okay.
that whole entire week was lived in fear, cigarettes, and horrible balony. it was the three of them against the world, and then everything came crashing down to the ground.
she had gotten a mild burn on her arm, almost exactly where dallas's was, and she thought dallas was okay.
but what she soon figured out was that he blamed himself for everything, and thought that she would just be better off without him.
but it did more harm than good, and she felt like she couldn't breathe, and all of her scars were opening back up.
"you selfish bastard!"she screamed, throwing the bottle at the building, and saw it shatter to the ground, along with the building structure falling down.
she sunk to the ground sobbing, and screams came from her lips, being heard throughout the valley.
she felt rage, she felt angry at him for abandoning her without any reason.
"you bastard!"
✰
( FLASHBACK TO JANUARY OF 1966! )
FINLEYS LIPS CURLED INTO A SOFT SMILE,
as dallas left soft kisses on her bare shoulder, and his hand on her stomach.
nobody else but finley had ever seen this side of dallas, and nobody else would.
one thing nobody knew about dallas winston was that he was like a big teddy bear with finley.
she was the only one who had gotten past that wall he had put at up, he was a big softie.
"how you feeling?"he asked her, and she turned to look at him, grinning.
"i feel like i could marry you with paper rings right now."she told him, and he smiled, starting to draw stars on her back.
"what are you doing?"she asked, looking up at him, "not that i'm complaining but don't start something you can't handle."
dallas chuckled, shaking his head, "i'm drawing stars around your scars."
finley furrowed her eyebrows, propping herself up on her elbow, letting her blonde hair fall over her bare shoulder.
"whatcha mean dal?"she questioned, stroking a hand through dally's messy black hair.
"i don't want to see you upset, and guilty anymore. i want you to be the old wren," he explained, "i want you to be the wren that i first met when i came here."
her eyes softened, and he gently placed her hands on his cheeks, before bringing his lips to hers.
she felt passion, love, and content with what she had with dallas.
she loved the way he knew her, how she wanted to be, and how he could make her feel just with his touch.
she pulled back, trying to catch her breath, and dallas put his head against hers.
her eyes flickered from his lips to his eyes, until she felt his lips brushing up against hers.
