Cyanide [4]

Phone Calls and Chimichangas

After a week, I got a surprise visit from my favorite pirate. I had been recently informed I would be stuck in the hospital for another 6 weeks. He dropped my phone onto my legs. "How have you been?" He asked as I pulled the phone closer.

"I get my wheelchair tomorrow," I said, still trying to get the phone. "I thought you got it last week," He said, picking it and moving it closer. "That one was temporary," He said, as I opened the phone. I was greeted with over 500 messages from Wade, and an equal number of calls and voicemails. "Mm. How long will you be here?" He asked.

"Several months. I have to recover, and learn to live in a wheelchair," I said, resting my phone on my leg. "That thing was going mad when I picked it up. Someone's desperate to get in touch with you," As he finished his sentence, my phone rang again. I sighed, chuckling as Patchy stepped into the hall. I accepted the call and held it up to my ear. "Finally! Do you know how fucking long I've been trying to reach you?" Wade's voice said, exasperated.

"Yeah, sorry, my phone was in New York while I was in Lagos," I said. "I nearly kicked myself when I heard you had gotten caught. Then, a week later, another headline. 'Escaped Criminal Rowena 'Cyanide' Darness found on beach in Lagos, Nigeria.' Why the fuck are you in Lagos, anyway?" He asked. "I swam there," I deadpanned. Or Deadpooled, whichever you prefer. "With broken legs?" He asked.

"Okay, the current did most of the work, but I swam for a mile to shore. My sweatpants are still damp," I said. "Of course, Rue taking all the credit, as usual," Wade chided. "You ain't any better, Wilson," I shot back. "You're right," We chatted for a while before Wade had to go. Something about a mission.

Man, I had missed that guy.

What I was not expecting, was after 3 weeks, another surprise visit. I was startled awake to something warm hitting my stomach. Wade in his Deadpool attire was looming over me. "What the fuck have you brought me this time? The severed head of a puppy?" I asked, annoyed at being awoken. "Aw, Rue, how dare you think so lowly of me. I brought you chimichangas!" He exclaimed.

"Okay, now I'm less annoyed. One common Hollywood trope that's true is that hospital food sucks. That, or the Author hates me," I said. "I'd say the Author hates you," He said. I opened the container and dug into the food. The tone quickly shifted from playful to serious. "How bad is it?" He asked, and I sighed.

"I broke 3 vertebrae, an extreme laceration to the spinal cord, my legs are now a mess of bone and metal, and I'm looking at Paraplegia," I said. "It's that bad?" He asked, and I nodded. "The doctor said that I'll probably never walk again," I said. "What're gonna do after this?" He asked. "I...have no idea," I said.

"How's your sister?" He asked. "We...fell out. Hard. She was pissed because I hadn't told her about my gigs, and we got into a big fight. We're probably not gonna stay in contact," I said. "How's Yukio and Negasonic Teenage Warhead?" I asked. "They're fine. We've got another in the gang now. Name's Cable. You'd like him," He said. "Well, we'll probably be able to meet when I get out of here," I said.

We talked for a few more hours when Captain Happy came back inside. "Oh. Wade, this is Captain Happy. Captain Happy, this is Wade, who I was telling you about earlier," I said, introducing the two. "I've never seen such joy on someone's face," Wade said sarcastically. "Why do you think he's called Captain Happy?" I asked, smirking. "My name is Director Fury. It's nice to meet you, Mr. Wilson," Fury said, extending a hand.

Yeah, let's just say that interaction did not go very well. Afterward, Wade left to back to Canada, leaving me with a thrilled Fury. "That's him?" He asked, and I nodded. "I told you he was nice," I smirked. "That is not the word I would use to describe him," Fury muttered.

a/n What? How dare you accuse me of updating during Social Studies while my camera's on.