Unraveled

Chapter 35

//TW- dark subjects. Please read at your own caution//

I knock on Brennan's studio door, waiting a moment before knocking again when he doesn't answer.

I bite my lip and look down at the doorknob, deciding to walk in.

Surprisingly it's unlocked.

"Brennan?" I call out, shutting his door behind me quietly.

The lights are off, the air conditioning cooling my skin from the hot weather outside.

I just barely left work, and I knew Brennan had today off.

I set down my work case by the door before walking into where I knew his bedroom was located.

I peered inside, and he stared blankly at the wall, his eyes wide open. It looks like he hadn't slept in a while.

I knock at his door softly, and he sits up quickly, staring at me.

Has he been like this all day? I thought silently to myself.

I take a seat next to him on his bed, and he looks really tired.

We haven't seen each other for about a week while he's been away working along shifts.

"Hey, talk to me." I reach out and touch his shoulder gently, and he quickly grabs my waist, and I move on top of his lap.

He attaches his lips to mine, and moves quickly and aggressively.

Stunned, I try to keep up with his movements, but eventually pull away, now deeply concerned about how he's acting.

"Brennan what is going on?" I ask softly, and he breaks eye contact with me.

I grab his chin lightly and lift his head up so he can stare at me again.

"We promised to be honest with each other. No more secrets." I told him, and he lets out a breath that he probably didn't know he was holding.

"I'm so sorry." I see his eyes tear up, and I bring my hands up to his cheeks, wiping away a few tears that fell from his green eyes.

"What are you sorry about?" I ask quietly, and his hands around my waist tighten.

"High school. You didn't deserve to be treated the way I treated you." More tears slip past, and I shake my head.

"Brennan please don't worry about it. We're both okay now and that's what matters." I kiss his forehead and he shakes his head.

"I get flashbacks." He says very quietly, I almost didn't catch it.

Is he talking about his nightmares?

He hides his face in my shoulder, and I let him begin to cry, each sob of his breaking my heart.

I hold him tightly against me, saying nothing as I rub my hands up and down his back.

"I'm worried. Please tell me what's going on so I can help. Please." I whisper to him, and Brennan says nothing.

I wait patiently as I let him cry out what he was feeling. My thoughts growing more concerned with each passing minute.

But I let him just do what he needed to do, and eventually he slowed down to a stop, looking at me with red eyes when he was ready.

"When I saw you for the first time in high school, I knew immediately that I liked you." He begins, and my eyes widen slightly, but I just nodded, urging him along.

"But around two years before I saw you, I came out to my parents and they weren't accepting. They thought they could try to 'fix' me." He avoids eye contact with me, and I shake my head.

"You don't need to be fixed in any way." I honestly tell him, and he nods.

"I realize that now, but back then I didn't. They sent me to a camp. They shoved down masculine reforms down my throat for an entire summer. Made me and everyone else do things like fix cars, anything considered stereotypically masculine, wear muted clothes, forced us to watch things we didn't want to watch because it didn't make sense to us. If we disobeyed they would..." he takes in a deep breath, trying to calm himself before continuing.

My eyes widen, and my mouth drops open.

"Please don't tell me this was a conversion camp your parents put you through, Brennan." I ask desperately, and when he doesn't say anything, the past between us begins to make sense.

"If we went against any rules we were punished. I don't want to go into detail, but it was so painful, Milo." Brennan sighs, and I just watch him carefully, not knowing what to say with this new information he's sharing with me.

"So when I saw you and had these repressed feelings come back up, I just acted on what they programmed me to do. I hurt you, belittled you, teased you, just anything to make me try to hate you."

"Brennan, listen to me. You are not a machine. If you were then you would still hate me because of how they manipulated you. But you aren't, and I feel so happy when I'm around you now." I take his head in my hands again, making sure I can see his green eyes staring into my gray ones.

"I don't get nightmares around you. The first night I did, but you take them away." He sheepishly tells me, and I give him a comforting smile.

"Then move in with me." I say without thinking, and I stun myself.

"What?" Brennan asks, making sure he heard me right.

I make sure that I want him to move in with me because I want him too, and not just because I pity him.

He doesn't deserve constant reoccurring nightmares. He deserves his daughter and our new little one in the way. He deserves a safe place that doesn't feel as dark, cold, and lonely.

"Move in with me." I say again, more reassuring this time.

I give him a light kiss, and run my fingers through his hair comfortingly.

"Please. I don't want you living here anymore." I say again when I pull my lips away from his, and I can still feel him staring at me in surprise.

"Zoe needs her dad, and so does the one on their way. And I need you." I smile confidently when he doesn't say anything.

The corner of his lips turn into a tiny smile, before he nods.

"Okay." He kisses me again.

"Okay." I breath out.

———
(Question of the day- who would be your god/goddess parent if you were in the Percy Jackson series?

I'd probably be a daughter of Hephaestus and apart of Artemis' hunt :) )