Their Moon

Chapter 6 - Relief

Third person's POV 

A few moments ago when moon was sleeping in her room

"What's wrong with the whole 'room's not ready' deal," Xavier asked Luca while the twins nodded their head.

"Now, I don't know if I am over analysing things or something but I saw a few scars on Moon's arms and I noticed a few things when I was at her old place" Luca said to the boys earning a confused look from them.

"What do you mean?" Xavier asked in a tone which says I know where this is going and I am not loving it

"When I was her old place there were few instances where she was digging her nails into her palms. Now I might be over analysing things but then I saw scars on her arms and to be honest, they looked self-inflicted. Are you getting what I am saying?" Luca tells Xavier with a tone that says please tell me you understand what I am saying.

"You think she harms herself?" Enzo asked with sadness

"I don't I just told you what I think about this whole thing" said Luca

"There's a way we can confirm this" Xavier replied earning looks from his brothers "but first let's not take any risk and remove all the sharp objects from Moon's room and then when big brother will be explaining Moon about 'house rules' we can check her bag. There isn't much stuff she just got a backpack and if what you are saying is right then she must be having some blades or sharp objects on her but we have to be careful. We don't want to make this awkward for her and we don't want her to draw suspicion." Xavier explained the whole thing to the guys

"Okay let's check her room first," said Lorenzo

They went to Moon's room and removed all the sharp objects except for the mirror.

Present

"Moon come with me," Salvatore said to Moon after they got done with their dinner

Salvatore took Moon to his room which had blue walls and a king-size bed. A study table, a couch and a lot of files

"Make yourself comfortable, Bambina"

She sat on the couch and Salvatore sat right in front of her

Moon's POV

"I am sorry for your loss, Sorella," Salvatore said with a tinch of sadness in his eyes and I cringed ugh

Bitch no

I am very happy about that useless fuck's death I need no sorrys

I didn't reply and just simply nodded

Can he finish with the whole 'rules' bullshit already?

"I know all this is new for you but I want you to know we are so happy to have you back" he said as he kept his hand on my hand

Bitch NO

I instantly pulled my hand away from his touch and stood up. He looked t me confused

"Are you okay, Sorella?"

He asked as he took a step in my direction and I instantly took a step back

"Don't touch me," I said in a tone much calmer than the one I used with the other guys

And because I did not want and question-answer round I asked him about the rules

"Just tell me the rules. I am very tired and I want to sleep"

I don't but at that moment without any reason, all my serotonin evaporated from my body I start feeling low

I hate this feeling. This fucking emptiness I suddenly start feeling without any reason. I hate it. This low feeling makes it difficult for me to do anything and now I don't even want to listen to his stupid rules I just want to lie down for fucks sake!

I need to feel something. I need to feel something.

You know what to do

I know

Good. Get our of here as soon as possible and for fuck's sake stop acting like an attention-seeking whore

"Moon, are you okay?" Salvatore asked me I must have zoned out

"My apologies I just zoned out I am sorry. Do you mind if I go to my room and sleep? I am really tired. You let me know about the rules tomorrow if that's okay with you?" I asked desperately. I need a relief

"Sure, love. You take care of yourself and if you need anything just let me know" he said with a look a concern

I said goodnight to him and exited his room

When I was going to the room that has my stuff Xavier called me

"Moon, your room is ready you can stay there now" he said smiling

"um, okay thanks let me just grab my stuff" I said as all my stuff was in that other room

"I asked Enzo and he kept your bag your room let me take you to your room" he said excitedly

"thanks" I said to him when I entered the room and it had beautiful white walls had it been some other time I would have been fangirling over it but right now my mind has taken control of me.

This is something I hate. I hate it when my mind, my thoughts, my emotions take control of me. I don't like losing control. I like control.

"I am just gonna sleep now" I said to Enzo to make him leave my room

"Goodnight, Moon" he smiled and he exited the room closing the door behind him

I immediately went to my back I need my blades.

Where are the fucking blades?!

I kept them. I remember keeping them. I remember clearly

I turned my bag upside down and dumped everything on the floor but there were no blades

What am I gonna do now I start searching for anything sharp in the room

I am scared of using anything other than blades and my cuts are not even deep. I just like it when it starts burning. But I need something sharp

I searched the whole room there is nothing. Nothing.

I feel weak. I hate feeling weak. My room looks a mess. I have no idea what to do

It is frustrating. I can't even cry. It's like there are no tears left

I just laid on the floor and curled into a ball. I can't do this. I can't go on living like this

You are doing this for attention

There is no one here!

You are very desperate. If anyone shows you even tiniest of love you start thinking that they like you and you end up dumping all your baggage on them. You are not sad you just do this for attention. You crave for attention and now you are doing all sort of stunts to gain their attention.

Just shut the fuck up!

A few tears escaped from my eyes as I tried to blink them away. As I was in my thoughts I felt someone sat near me on the floor.

Xavier