Chapter 35: Trust

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With Lee and Corliss gone, Katherine felt the weight of her decision settling on her shoulders. She brought Nestor into her hands, looking around the room that had given her all of the joy making him possible. He was flickering, weaker than he had ever been, but still just solid enough to curl up in her hands and rub his beak against her wrist.

"Just you and me now," she said to him, finally letting her tears fall. She took down some of her protections, leaving only the anti-wizard cloak and the largest flagging charm in place. As the other magic came back into her chest, she felt herself steadying, more effective than any cup of coffee. She walked back to her bedroom, pulled on the cardigan that Molly had made her, and cracked away one last time.

As she sat on the side of the mountain overlooking Jenny Lake, buried in a grove of trees, she took a deep breath and tugged at her socks. Nestor stood on her shoulder and she let him glow brightly, no one around to see them.

"Mom," she said, talking to air. She still couldn't bring herself to go back to the cemetery, but she felt Evie here as much as she did anywhere. "Mom, I don't know why you never told me any of this. You were always telling me to be strong, to take risks, to shine my armor and fight my own battles. But you kept this battle so hidden that I never got a chance to prepare for it."

She shook her head, closing her eyes tightly as her throat contracted. "I met your dad. He was kind of a jerk, honestly. But I think he just missed you. It was like it bothered him that he didn't know why I bothered him. What I reminded him of. But once he knew—he loved you a lot. I wish I could have met him in better circumstances. And he said your mom's name was Ivy. I always wondered where that came from."

The lake glimmer in the rising sunshine. She could have sat here for hours, but she knew her pause button could only last a few more moments.

"I miss you, Mom. I miss you a lot. But I can't keep living in the past or the what ifs or the crumble. I've got to find a way forward. I promise you I won't give up."

She looked at the initials on her sleeve. Even if the F.W. was a lie, it was a part of her now, a part that would stay just as close to her as the E.W.

"I love you, Mom."

She popped away then, leaving only one last falling tear behind.

When she arrived back in the house, she began to collect her things. She only had a few pieces of bread left, so she made one final sandwich and drained what was left of the coffee. Cleaning the places where Corliss had set up camp in her bedroom, she managed to make all of the trash disappear. From room to room, she went about cleaning and straightening, making the bed and folding the blankets and doing all the laundry. She pulled her suitcase out and managed to replicated Hermione's charm, so all of her favorite clothes fit inside.

It took all morning to get everything in order. When she finished, she wiped off the makeup she had put on earlier, now smudged anyways, and set about a full face. Nestor stood on the counter while she blended and brushed, sweeping colors across her eyes and cheeks until she was satisfied. Finishing with her favorite soft blush lipstick and a final coat of mascara, she felt like herself for the first time in weeks. She tucked in the turtleneck and pinned the curls back out of her face, fluffing them back into shape.

Her reflection stared back at her. She looked controlled and polished, standing tall with her shoulders back, nothing like the boggart. Katherine pushed that memory deep in her gut and pulled out her wand, bringing Picquery's face to her mind. I need to talk to you, she thought. You know where to find me. She slipped the wand in her waistband, hiding it in the folds of the cardigan she still wore.

It didn't take long for her to feel him coming. She put the last of her toiletries in her backpack and slid it on, then took the suitcase by the handle. Slipping on her black boots, she let the heels grow just a little bit beneath her feet. She pulled on her long black winter peacoat and slid the gloves Bill and Fleur had given her onto her hands. By the time she stepped out the door, his car had pulled up behind Iz's. "It's okay," she said to Nestor, who looked ready to strike at any moment. She let him fade back into her fingers.

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