Sinner and Saint

Chapter Five

The sun was just creeping into the building when I woke up to find Stellan gone from the bed.

The dull headache was no surprise.

The pang of disappointment that instantly hit me was.

I stamped it down.

It was for the best.

Maybe we wouldn't have to talk.

Stellan wasn't like the men I could easily push around. He compelled honesty in me and what I have to be honest about, should he ever ask, overwhelmed me at the moment.

Aware that my dress was still somewhere up on the rooftop, I slipped off the bed, not bothering to cover up. I found my underwear on the floor. I needed to rinse my mouth, empty my bladder and clean up at the very least, even if I badly wanted a shower.

"The bathroom's just down the hallway to your right."

I jumped at Stellan's voice, my hands going to all kinds of awkward places that needed covering. I turned around and found him stepping off the stairs that led to the rooftop, my dress draped neatly over his arm.

I said nothing as he walked over to me and held the dress up for my inspection.

"It's ripped in some structurally-critical points," he said, a faint smile curling on his mouth. His glasses were back on, as well as a pair of jeans. But he was shirtless and barefoot, sporting messy, freshly washed hair that made my throat go dry.

"I can fix it but it's probably not going to look pretty," he continued so casually as if I wasn't standing there as naked as the day I was born.

"It's fine. I'm sure it can still cover the important parts," I managed to say. "I might need to borrow a jacket or a button-up shirt though."

Finally, he glanced down at all my naked glory, his smile deepening. "I'm sure I can find something you can wear."

I wanted to haul him back to bed at that moment, with his eyes taking me in like that as if he was recalling every spot on my body that he'd touched the night before.

But morning was here.

And so were the consequences.

"I'm going to shower and get changed in five minutes and I'll be out of your hair," I blurted out in a rush. "I'll call a cab now and—"

"I'm going to make us breakfast while you shower," he cut me off gently, leaning forward to brush a kiss on my forehead. It touched me almost the same second his hand settled on the curve of my hip. "Then we can talk, if you'd like."

I fought the temptation to melt against him and leaned back so that his touch could fall away. "We don't need an entire meal to have this talk. It's real quick and simple. We had too much to drink last night, gave in to the usual base urges and now we move forward as soon as I'm sufficiently washed and clothed to get into a cab. I'm clean and I've been on the pill since I've been legally allowed to get it. You seem like the kind of guy who should be safe so I'm gonna go with that. Nothing to worry about. I'll be out of here in a flash."

"You giving me this exact speech right now is evidence enough that this isn't going to be quick or simple," Stellan said calmly because damn it, can't this man just not have it together for a little bit every now and then?

I drew a deep breath and looked directly into his eyes as stubbornly as I could manage. "I've said my piece and you can take it or leave it. I'm not staying beyond the shower I'm going to take right now."

I marched into the bathroom and firmly shut the door behind me. I called one of my cabbie buddies who I knew would be up and working around this time before quickly doing my business in the toilet and jumping into the shower. The water wasn't even warm yet but I welcomed the cold and its sobering effect. I had no choice but to use his body wash. The last thing I needed was to smell him on me all day but one-night-standers can't be choosers. I found a clean towel from a linen shelf and had just wrapped myself in it when there was a knock on the door.