A/N: There will be a lemon in this chapter. If you do not like sexualy explicit content or are too young, you should not read the full contents of this chapter.
Amethyst's POV
He walks into my room, and for the first time... I'm nervous about someone seeing my room. He wants to get to know me but... What if he finds he doesn't like the real me? Heh, it's kinda silly. I honestly wouldn't have chosen to interact with him a few days ago. Now, he might decide he doesn't want to talk to me! I think this is irony? Never could figure out that word. I watched him look around at my treasured piles of junk. His face was stony, and hard to read. Then he cracked a smile; even started to chuckle. Y/N: "Hehehe, this place is certainly interesting. Full of neat little mementos and, er... 'treasures'." I start laughing in relief. He gets it! Woo!
I sat down on one of the many trash piles around my room. Amethyst: "Sit wherever dude, let's chat." He looked at one of the piles big enough to serve as a seat for him with a bit of concern. Amethyst: "I know what you're thinking, and, honestly, I don't care too much if you break something by sitting on it. If I did, I'da not told you to sit down." He looked over at me, shrugged, and sat down on the junk pile. It sagged under his weight and we could both hear the sound of things cracking and straining. I snickered a bit at that, while he looked away, a bit embarrassed.
Y/N: "Well... Now what?" I blinked in surprise. I... didn't expect to get this far. Huh. My lack of planning twarts me again. Hey, I just realized. A big, strong, handsome man is now in my room. If this were one of those trashy romance novels Pearl thinks we don't know she reads, we'd be ripping each others clothes off and having sex. Which, I mean, that does sound fun, but let's call that plan B. I try to think of a conversation topic.
... This is harder than it seems. I don't know many things he really likes; well, ok, fighting and violence but I don't really like those things. It dawns on me... I don't know him as well as I feel like I do. He's been so friendly the past two days that I kinda forgot that we haven't really talked so much as I've been teaching him about Earth and he's been listening. Well, ok, we've also talked about me a bunch... And thus, a conversation starter!
Amethyst: "So... If you don't mind, tell me about yourself." He straightened up, and looked rather stiff and 'military'. Y/N: "I am an Iolite warrior, of berzerker classification. I-" I cut him off. Amethyst: "Yeah yeah, that stuff's obvious. I could hear it from any other Iolite; I want to know you. As in, Y/N the person, not Y/N the Iolite." He blunk in surprise and his blank expression turned to one of confusion... then concern. Y/N: "I uhh... That's... That's a harder question then it should be." I raised an eyebrow. Amethyst: "Really? Wanna tell me why dude?" He sighed, and scratched the back of his head, searching for the words.
Y/N: "I uh... I haven't actually thought about myself much outside the context of who I was supposed to be in the Empire. I know I like structure and rules, and I know I like violence and think it has its place in the world but..." He looked out across one of the larger puddles (ok, more like a small lake really) in my room. Y/N: "I've never really taken the time to... think about myself beyond my role in the Empire and the damned maniac in my skull." He grimaced; that comparison probably got him yelled at by the voice in his head.
Amethyst: "Well... Start doing that." He looked at me askew. Y/N: "Excuse me?" Amethyst: "If you've never taken the time to think about yourself in detail... then do it. Find out who you are. If you don't, you won't fit in on Earth." He looked... nervous. Vulnerable, even. It's always... odd, to see someone so strong seem so unsure of themselves. Luckily, I know all about self doubt.
Y/N: "What if what I find is as terrible as it feels like?" Amethyst: "Who you are, is who you are. It won't be perfect. You have to accept that, and accept yourself." "What if I can't?" "You can." "What if it's too horrible to accept?" "Then work on changing it." "How can I change myself?" "Hard work usually works. Being open and honest with others is a big part of that though." "But what if-" "If you hide from yourself, no one will know the real you." "The real me is a monster." "Then why did you decide not to kill us when you had the chance?" "So I could bring you in alive!" "Why would that matter?"
YOU ARE READING
Crush! Kill! Destroy! (Male! Gem Reader)
ספרות חובבים(Y/N) is an Iolite berserker of deepest blue, one of the rarest and strongest of the Iolites. But more than that, he is a rare and powerful Male Gem! Unfortunately, he is cursed by his own existence, with a voice in his head driving him to rage and...
