𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙮..𝙙.𝙢

thirty four.

Draco's pov

She's been unconscious for hours. Still and un moving-almost peaceful. I sit there by her bed side holding her cold hand hoping she'd wake up -praying she'd wake up. She'd smile her beautiful smile iv missed every day. And it would be the kind of smile where your heart skips a beat and you wouldn't even able to stop yourself from smiling too. She'd wake up and she'd forgive me for everything. Every shitty thing iv ever done. But she can't do that when she's not conscious to do. So i beg silently for her to wake up.

Wake up

I beg.

To whoever will listen.

My head screams constantly.

It screams at the fact i didn't do anything - that i didn't stop Bella because of my fear that i would have made it worse. How i got dragged into being a death eater to protect my family because of my father's failure. I wish i could take back all the things iv done. But i can't

It screams i'm a coward. That i'm selfish. Screams i'm a horrible person who doesn't deserve this girl.

But i deserve it because i just couldn't stay away from her because

In my world she's an angel.

In hers i'm the devil.

And she's my only escape from everything. She's the only thing that's kept me going and kept me strong.

She lays there and i noticed there's some sort of peace in her face, like the stress of everything just vanished.  but her body tells a different story. She's pale and not her normal soft olive skin tone and skin and bones with cuts and bruises covering her body due to the curse she had to endure. She looks like she's hanging by a thread. My heart clenches as the sight of her wreathing body on the floor of the manner replays in my head.

3 times.

Each time more powerful then the last.

She doesn't move. She almost looks dead. And the thought of losing her makes it hard to breath.

but I listen to her breathing reassuring myself that she's still alive.

Her hearts still beating.

She's alive.

She's still with me.

My mind won't shut off. No matter how much i try to use occlumency to keep myself from having a panic attack it doesn't work. It's like the guilts eating me alive. Like everything iv been ignoring and buring rushed to the surface just by the look at her. And the knowing of everything iv done has caused me to have an incessant throb in my heart. And it's breaking me down.

Bit by bit.

I keep thinking that i should have never kissed her at fred's stupid party. I should have never got involved with her. I should have let you be. That maybe your life would have been better without me. Or maybe you'd be happier.

Maybe you wouldn't be laying in this bed like you are.

The minutes feel like hours and just when i think the worlds going to swallow me up and the knot in my throats going to suffocate me there's a light knock at the door followed my a short silence.

"Draco, dear the healers here."

The door clicks open and two people enter the room and i feel a light hand on my shoulder but i don't turn to look as i watch the healers wave their wands and pull up a bunch of screens that tower over her head that look like monitors.I can faintly hear the healer mumbling to herself about something on the charts but i can't quite hear.

"Draco.. you should get some rest.. it's been hours"

I shake my head and grip her hand more tightly. I can hear my mother sigh faintly before speaking to the healer.

"What's wrong with her" She asks the healer as she crosses her hands behind he back. The healer looks up before taking the screens down.

"Well she's extremely malnourished and she seems like she hasn't been getting much sleep in months and from the looks of it..." She trailed off as she pulled her sleeve up and examining her body with the cuts and bruises on them.

"How many times was she hit with the cruciatus curse and for how long ?" The healer asked as she pulled paisleys sleeve back down and setting it back down by her side and looked up at Narcissa.

Narcissa looked down at Draco sadly before looking up at the healer. She opened her mouth to answer but before she can utter a word she's cut off.

"3 times. 5 minutes the first time 3 the second and 1 the third." Draco said quietly without looking up at the healer.

The healer let out a slight gasp before pulling up the charts again. Reading and re reading them over again.

"One should never be hit 3 times and for that long and in her current conditions" She said as she studied the charts that hovered over Paisleys head. She looked at them for a little longer before waving her wand and taking them back down. She looked over a Draco and frowned before looking at Narcissa.

"She's going to need healing potions if you can get them down her throat and" She reached into her bag and pulled out a container of cream before continuing and handing it to Narcissa.

"Rub these on the cuts and bruises.. they will help with the healing process and with scaring" she said as she took one last look as Paisley. Narcissa nodded before muttering a apology and obliviating the healers mind and sending her off. She couldn't take a chance of anything getting back to bellatrix or the dark lord. Even if she did make everyone forget Paisley was here she wanted to play it safe until she woke up.

The hours quickly turned into days. She's been unconscious for 2 days. I sat there by her side every minute of the day. I make her unconscious body drink the potions and iv rubbed the cream the healer had given them and it was working extremely well. Most of her bruises were fading away or already completely gone and the cuts that littered her body were pretty much healed with very minimal scaring. Her cheeks have slowly began to become rosy with color again.

The healer came by early morning yesterday to see if she'd made any changes over night. She had said she was worried that she wasn't going to wake up because she'd never seen someone in such horrible conditions be hit with the cruciaus curse 3 times in a row and not go completely insane or die from it.

I wonder what you were doing all this time. And why bella hated you so much. I don't understand why she had hit you with such powerful curses. I let out a sigh and brush a lock of blonde hair out of her face before leaning back in my chair and continuing the book i was reading.

I abruptly woke up to a gasping sound and my heart beating in my chest.

Then we locked eyes.

Silver on blue-green.