Memories

LXV

IRIS

'And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
And sooner or later, it's over
I just don't wanna miss you tonight'

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When Thalia made her way to her art studio the day after she arrived back at campus, she didn't expect the girl working there, Lily, to smile and give her the keys. "We were told you came back. I'm glad you did, I loved your work." Thalia smiled and thanked her, taking the keys and walking down the familiar hallway. 

It was empty, of course. Thalia knew that. Neil had taken all her art back to his and Matt's dorm after he'd returned. She looked around. All her brushes and paints and everything else were still where she'd left it, though, and she was surprised they hadn't moved another student in yet, but supposed they wouldn't have until the start of the next school year. 

She pulled out her phone and dialed the number she'd given Neil in a letter when they'd been split up. It went to voicemail, which Thalia had suspected would happen - time differences and all - but she left a message; 'Hey, Jeremy, it's Thalia. I just wanted to make sure Jean was fitting in alright over there. Neil told me he got my message, and sent him over to you. I'm back at Palmetto, though I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone but Jean. Call me back, okay? I want to know how he's doing. Thanks.'

Thalia left the studio and headed back to the dorms. The team had arranged to have brunch together, and Thalia just missed her team. After brunch where Allison had arranged for the team to go the mountains for a week, Andrew drove to the dorms and he and Neil switched so Neil could drive when the others got out. Kevin got in the front seat and Thalia stayed in the back. 

Neil drove to the stadium where they'd meet with Abby for a checkup, and Kevin would talk to Wymack. Thalia knew some part of Kevin didn't want to tell the man he was his father, but she squeezed his hand in support, and Kevin gripped it back. Thalia felt a searing pain go up through her arm but didn't say anything as she blinked spots out of her eyes. Neil looked back at the two of them as he walked down the hall.

"Let me talk to him first. He won't want to talk to anyone after you're finished with him." Neil said to Kevin. Thalia kicked her foot out and hit him in the back of the calf. If hurt them both and Neil rubbed his leg with a frown on his face.

Thalia sat in the locker room with Kevin while Neil talked to Wymack and helped him prepare for the conversation he was about to have. "So what do you think you're going to say?" she asked. Kevin sighed and put his head in his hands. Thalia rubbed his back in support. "Okay let's practice. I'll be Wymack."

"Hey coach," Kevin said, looking up at Thalia.

"What's up, Kevin?" Thalia said, using her best impression of the coach.

"Uh, I just wanted to tell you something important."

"Well, what is it? I don't have all day." Thalia said. Before Kevin could give a reply, Neil walked out of the office and over to the two of them. He stood in front of Kevin, who stood to meet Neil's gaze. Neil shook his head.

"Don't do this to him." Neil said, surprising Thalia. He glanced at her once before heading for Abby's office which was open slightly. He closed the door after him and Kevin collapsed back onto the sofa with Thalia after the lock clicked. Neither of them said anything for a few moments.

"Kevin," Thalia said softly. "It's not too late to back out." he nodded and swallowed before standing and making his way down the hall to Wymack's open door.

Thalia waited in the locker room until Neil was finished with his checkup and then switched places with him. Thaila walked into Abby's office and sat on the bed, ready for her to check over her wounds.

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When they got back to Fox tower, Kevin had his arm on the windowsill of the car and his head in it, eyes closed. Thalia knew he just needed space, so she kissed his cheek and left him in the car. Neil turned back to talk to Kevin, but Thalia held the door to the tower open for him. Neil collected Nicky and the twins from their room and everyone gathered in the girls' room. Thalia went into the other room to pack her things, but heard Neil's voice through the thin walls.

"Coach is Kevin's dad." she tensed before springing into action. Thalia ran through the door and stopped at the sight of the entire team watching her and Neil stare each other down. 

"Abram, what the everloving fuck did you just say?" Thalia said, seething with rage. Neil could tell she was angry, and Thalia saw Andrew out of the corner of her eye, twirling a blade in his hands. It was a clear warning, but Thalia knew he wouldn't step in between her and Neil. This was their business, and it didn't matter how much they both meant to Andrew, he wouldn't stop them from sorting out their problems, however they saw fit.

"I told the team what they deserved to hear. Besides, he agreed to let me tell them." Neil said. Thaila ground her teeth together and stayed silent. "Now would you let them react like normal human beings or are you going to keep staring at me like I just burned your favourite painting?" Thalia huffed a sigh and disappeared back into the bedroom, shoulders set tenser than they ever had been.

As soon as she left the room, Thalia heard the team yelling at Neil. Nicky asking if he was being serious and Neil responding with a 'She taught coach exy.' Thalia rolled her eyes though she was still annoyed. Even if Kevin had agreed to let Neil tell the rest of the team, her brother could have at least told her he was going to do it first. Maybe then she wouldn't have reacted so badly.

Dan didn't react so well, asking how long Kevin had known and Neil saying a couple of years. Thalia was finally finished packing her things and joined the others, who looked at her and went silent. "How long have you known?" Dan asked.

"I was there when he found out." Thalia said eventually. "But obviously I lost memories. That was one of them. I only got it back a few months ago." Dan nodded slowly. 

"He should have said something when he ran away," Dan said. "He's been here a year and a half now. He had no right to keep something like this from coach for so long. Jesus, he didn't-" Dan's voice caught in her throat. "That's not right. It's not fair."

"Life's not fair, Dan," Thalia said, a sharp edge in her tone. "You should know that. The whole team should know that." she looked around at the team, who were all in different stages of shock. "Wymack knows that too." Thalia turned finally to Dan. "He told me parts of his backstory. I assume you know it all." Dan nodded hesitantly. "Then you'll know he wouldn't want to fuck up something as fragile and innocent as a child. As his child. I'm not saying what Kevin's mother did was the best idea she ever had, but Wymack would have stressed over every fucking day in Kevin's life if he'd known he was his son."

Thalia heard Andrew mutter 'Another brilliant Josten speech' but she didn't turn to look at him. Dan made a sound of hurt and pushed past Thalia to the bedroom, slamming the door behind her. Thalia looked at the ground, suddenly feeling shameful and guilty. Sure, she may have hurt Dan at the beginning, when she'd just joined the Foxes, but saying those things may well mean the end of a friendship with the captain.

"She'll never forgive him for this," Allison said, exchanging a tired look with Renee, who'd scooted over to fill Dan's place at Matt's side.

"She'll get over herself." Thalia said harshly and grabbed her things, heading downstairs, no matter how much it hurt her arms and threatened to pull her stitches.