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SMOKE's INTERLUDE

SMOKE's INTERLUDE

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"So how is it?"

"How's what?"-Smoke

"All of this, your life?"

"It's... okay, it's not as great as it seems. Everything looks perfect to the media but in real life, it ain't. Don't get me wrong it's not horrible"-Smoke

"I'm sure, explain yourself, I mean, you've got the fame, the money, the cars- pfft.. what's not to love about your life?"

"Think of it like this, What's materialistic things and money without true happiness or the people you love? It's not much.. money can't solve all of my true problems"-Smoke

"Like?"

"Trell dying. I don't show it but, it's taking a toll on me. Sometimes I wish I could bring him back I beg god to reverse the time and take me instead, since Trell's life was more important than mine"-Smoke

"How exactly was Trell's life more important than your own?"

"Cause he actually had people who loved him, family. He had a happy life.. dude was always smiling he was the light in a dark room, without him I wouldn't even be who I am right now.. he had a mom who loved him.. brothers who looked up to him. The whole block loved him. Now with him gone everybody, everything just isn't the same. His mom is broken, his brothers done turned to the streets which is the same shit he was keeping them from and me.. I'm just even more fucked up. My condition ain't nothing new though imma always be this way"-Smoke

"You'll always be what?"

"Fucked up, damaged, misguided, unloved, crazy"-Smoke

"You're not any of those things, why do you speak so negative about yourself"

"It's just the truth and I'm a honest nigga"-Smoke

"What makes you think you're all of those things?"

"I know I am, my mom says it I'm sure everybody around me thinks it. I mean what normal person wakes up in the middle of the night fighting themselves? What normal person puts hands on their pregnant girlfriend?"-Smoke

"A person who makes mistakes, you're admitting to the things you've done now you can work on fixing everything"

"I Can't fix shit, what's done is done. Ion think I'll ever forget the look in Renae's eyes the day she told me she was pregnant. She looked so scared, she looked so.. sad I knew for a fact she ain't want no baby with me. I don't blame her I done put her through a lot as if she ain't already been through enough, who in their right mind would want to be stuck with someone like me?"-Smoke

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