Out of Touch

a1

3rd person pov

They sigh and close the journal. Leaning their arms against the table to support their upward movements. The armrests are scratched up, almost appearing as if they've been bitten into with the missing chunks. The pillow that's used as a backrest flops to the side as they rise off the old chair and hastily snatch the journal off the desk.

"I'm tired of looking at you," they snarl.

Walking over to the top drawer of their dark wooden dresser, they aggressively grab the handle and yank it open. Moving aside some undergarments and hidden junk to make room. Impatiently placing the journal inside and shoving the drawer closed.

Scanning the room they sigh once more and make their way back to their desk, smoothly grabbing a piece of printer paper out of the packet.

1st person pov

scratch paper—

It never occurred to me how exhausting journaling could be.

Maybe I was doing it too often? All I've been doing is vomiting out my emotions, but if you've ever thrown up.. you know that your airways get clogged and it makes the feeling 10 times worse.

So I'm done for now.

I decided to try looking up questions on the internet you can ask yourself. To get your mind off of things, ground your mental again. Just a self check along with with some fun ones.

I need to stop writing like I'm talking to you. I'm not in my journal, I'm throwing this paper away later.

Anyway, here w̶e̶ I go!

— Favorite color?
Ah were staring off easy.

Black or white. I really like periwinkle too, it's comforting.

— Favorite movies?
I'm a sucker for psychological thriller and horror.

Parasite, Joker, The Call, Us, Get Out.
But I also have a huge soft spot for cartoon and family movies. Favorite is hands down Coraline. Along with Nightmare before Christmas, Corpse bride, Flushed away, Ratatouille and the lists goes on. y̶o̶u̶ ̶g̶e̶t̶ ̶i̶t̶.

—Favorite songs?
My favorite question. There's too many good songs in this word, the list would truly never end if I named all the ones in my head. I'll give a few in no particular order.

Knee socks- Arctic Monkeys
Anything by Arctic Monkeys is an instant dopamine boost.

Mystery Lady- Masego, Don Toliver
This song came out only a couple months ago I believe. I've been addicted since.

Special Affair- The internet
This song is sex. That's all.

Sweet Insomnia- Gallant & 6lack
People know the song is good if 6lack is in it.

21- Dean

Pied Piper- BTS

For these 2, people need to understand music goes beyond barriers. No matter what language it's in, music is music. What serenades y̶o̶u̶r̶ someone's insides and what makes y̶o̶u̶r̶ their head sway is all that matters. Regardless of if other don't like it.

This makes me think. Maybe I could put a song at the beginning of every journal entry. One that fits my mood.

s̶o̶... ̶t̶h̶e̶y̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶ ̶u̶n̶d̶e̶r̶s̶t̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶t̶t̶e̶r̶.