An Earnest Favour

XXXI

"To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless." G.K. Chesterton

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XXXI.

Jack entered the bedroom tentatively, and Claire observed that he was holding Perrie, for perhaps the first time. She had never seen him hold her. He carried his niece on his hip.

His expression was reserved, and Claire didn't know how to feel for a long moment. He was returned. She had seriously considered, up until receiving his letter regarding the house, that he might very well elect not to return to Ashwood. Up until she had broached the subject of Arthur, they had been such a pair, such a team, and Claire had truly felt as though it might be different.

She knew very well what he wanted from her, and Claire believed that she would one day be able to give that to him. But whether Jack liked it or not, Claire had a past, and a very painful one, with Arthur, who at this point in time, was making it very difficult for Claire to have a future. She had never shared any of her experiences with Jack, and perhaps that was what had been holding her back from fully trusting him. Ought not she be able to share these experiences with her husband?

But the moment she had even mentioned his name, Jack had assumed the worst of her, and he had abandoned her. Claire decided that Jack could call it business all he liked. But she had been alone these two months with nobody to talk to. Her world had shrunk exponentially since becoming with child, and though that was not Jack's fault, leaving her without the chance to properly explain was.

Jack had left, and Arthur had fully taken advantage of that fact. It was attention she no longer wanted or desired, and it was something that her husband ought to know. But what would happen if she brought up the subject of Arthur again? Would he publicly disgrace her as a whore this time?

Jack did not trust Claire. He had made that perfectly clear. But now, Claire feared, she did not trust Jack. And she was loathe to feel such a way, for up until that argument, Jack had been her perfect champion.

Jack's hazel eyes settled on her, and he offered her a small, yet well-meaning smile. Claire did not rise to greet him. Partly because she had been supporting her sister for hours and hours with a weight the size of a large pumpkin under her skirt, and partly because she was angry. Mostly because she was angry.

"Jack, when did you return?" Grace asked lethargically. "You never told us you were coming back today. Did he tell you, Claire?"

"No," Claire replied quickly.

"No, I didn't tell anyone I was returning today, though I am happy to have made it back for the birth." Jack placed Perrie down on the bed, and she immediately crawled across the bedclothes to her mother.

"If you delayed much longer, you might have missed the birth of your own child," Cecily said disapprovingly.

"I would not have missed the birth of my own child, Mother," retorted Jack.

"Enough," ordered Adam, as Perrie began to peer over the blanket that her sister was wrapped in.

"What is it?" Perrie asked curiously as she extended her index finger to poke the baby.

Claire couldn't help but smile. Her sister was in absolute raptures, and Adam appeared to be the proudest father there ever was as he looked over his two daughters, and the wife he adored.

"She's a baby," answered Grace softly. "She's your sister. You must be very gentle."

Perrie obeyed her mother, and gently stroked the top of Lily's head, seemingly enjoying the feeling of the tuft of dark hair.