TCW FebuWhump Prompts

Here For You

Day 2 Prompt: "I can't take this anymore"
Warnings: suicide attempt

Wolffe stumbled away, a million thoughts running through his head. His brothers, the soldiers; they were gone. Marching away from him. They were supposed to stick by their general, but one by one, they each died, not even saying goodbye. He felt so empty. A beer bottle was in his hand as he sat in a secluded room, tears streaming down his dirty face.

Why? Why do I have to be the one left alive?

Sinker and Boost survived to have each other, but him? He had no one, everyone taken in the attack on the Malevolence. He eyed the blaster sitting on the ground a few feet away from him.

No one cares about us clones. Only General Plo and a handful of others. No one would care if I died. They'll just replace me.

"I can't take this anymore," Wolffe whispered, tired from grieving for soldiers after every single battle. He'd never run out of tears, crying for every soldier. The loss, the trauma; it was all too much.

He slowly got up, his hand shakily moving to the weapon.

Does anyone really need me?

He wanted to be with his brothers. It was a selfish thought, but after all he had done for the Republic, he didn't care. In his drunkenness, he forgot about all the people who loved him and cared for him as a person. He was too wallowed in grief to see it. He placed the blaster under his chin, closing his eyes.

It'll be quick, just one cli-

"No!"

The door slammed open and the weapon was wrenched away from him, an invisible force throwing it on the other side of the room.

He snarled. He could've had a peaceful ending, but someone had to ruin it. He was engulfed in a hug, small lanky arms wrapped around him and he froze in the rare sign of affection. He tried to identify who it was, and all he knew was that it wasn't another trooper. As the person pulled away he saw big blue tearful eyes looking straight at his.

"Vod'ika?" The name rolled off his tongue easily before he even thought about it. She had just come into the army a few weeks ago, but he had known her even before then. General Koon had brought the little soon-to-be padawan to meet the Wolfpack, and although he didn't like her much in the beginning, he did now.

"Why Wolffe?" Ahsoka whimpered, her eyes seeming to stare straight at his soul. She held both of his hands and moved closer, not caring for the stench of alcohol under his breath. She already knew the reason, but she needed to hear it. His hands gently wrapped around hers.

"Malevolence," he whispered. Ahsoka's hands squeezed around him tighter. "How did you know I was gonna...you know."

Ahsoka let go and sat beside him, one hand resting on his shoulder. He reveled at how tiny she was, a protective side surging through him. She might be small, but as sappy as it sounded, she had a big heart.

"The force. It made me run out of the briefing."

Wolffe's eyes widened in surprise. A briefing was important, and yet here a Jedi was, comforting him, one out of a million. As if reading his thoughts, she continued her explanation.

"They don't need me anyway. Master Plo and Skyguy can do it."

Wolffe chuckled, shaking his head. Ahsoka took the bottle out of his hand and turned towards him, pleadingly, the serious atmosphere picking up. 

"Don't do that ever again. Promise?"

He knew that she would always try to be there for each and every clone, he included. Seeing a clone die always seemed to take some spark out of her eyes, and he didn't want to be the cause of it. 

"I promise."

The two of them never spoke about Wolffe's attempt at death, and it stayed that way to the grave.