Transmission from the Trickster

Chapter 56

Sam and Gabriel stay by the funeral pyre long after the last of the flames have dissipated. Gabriel doesn't seem ready to leave just yet, doubtlessly reliving old family memories. Sam has quite a few memories with Lucifer, too, though his are far less pleasant. To say he feels uncomfortable standing in front of Lucifer's corpse — after a hunter's funeral, no less — for so long would be an understatement, but he can only imagine he'd feel worse if he told Gabriel he was going to leave him alone.

So he waits.

And waits.

And waits.

And waits some more.

Until finally, finally, Gabriel looks up at him and asks, "Does Dean know you're here?"

Sam's a bit taken aback by the question. Dean was the last thing on his mind right now. Why was he the first thing on Gabriel's?

"In theory," Sam says, because how is he supposed to explain that he left the guy a brief note and ditched with his car in the middle of the night?

"Then I'm going to assume he's worried that you've been gone too long." Gabriel glances off to the side, then amends, "Or he will be soon."

Sam follows his gaze to see the sun peeking up between the trees. He's been out all night. By the time he gets back, Dean is definitely going to be awake, and he's definitely going to be asking questions. That never ends well.

"You wanna head back to the bunker?" Sam asks.

Gabriel turns his attention back to the funeral pyre. "You can."

Sam fights the urge to roll his eyes. The whole point of coming out here was to bring Gabriel back, or at least to make sure he's okay. Leaving the guy alone to mourn the loss of his psychopath of a brother was definitely not in the cards.

"If you want to stay, I'll stay with you," Sam offers, though, in reality, it's not really an offer when he refuses to change his mind.

"You've already wasted your whole night on me," Gabriel says. "I don't need your morning, too."

"Then come back with me," Sam suggests.

"No, thanks."

"Those are really your only two choices, you know," Sam says. "I'm not just going to leave you alone out here."

"Why not?"

"Well, 'cause..."

What does he even say to that? Why does he care whether Gabriel's out here all alone? He's clearly not going to hurt anyone, though, honestly, that thought had barely crossed his mind. The only one whose safety could be compromised is Gabriel himself, and that's where he draws the line.

So Sam just says, "Because you're my friend."

Gabriel tears his gaze away from the pyre to look up at Sam, an unreadable expression on his face. Sam begins to fear he messed up, that he said the wrong thing and upset him. He's not sure how it would have been the wrong thing, but it must mean something to Gabriel if he managed to get the guy's full attention.

After a long pause, Gabriel says, "Okay."

Sam waits for a moment in case there's something he'd like to add, and when he doesn't, Sam asks, "'Okay' as in you want to come back to the bunker?"

"I don't really want to but I will," Gabriel says.

That's not quite the enthusiastic response he was looking for, but he'll take what he can get. "Alright, the car's over there." He only makes it a couple of steps before realizing that Gabriel's probably not a car fan, so he adds a quick, "If you want to take the impala back. It's only a couple hours' drive, but if you'd rather --"

"The car is fine," Gabriel says.

Sam eyes him warily. He's just being so... dull. Lifeless. His usual air of enthusiasm and snarkiness is long gone, and Sam finds himself wondering if it's ever going to come back. He's never seen Gabriel so broken up about anything. It's almost hard to believe this is the same trickster who went out of his way not to take anything seriously the first few times they met.

But if Gabriel wants to take the impala home, Sam isn't in the position to tell him no. He's not sure why Gabriel wouldn't rather just fly them and the car to the bunker -- something Sam isn't particularly fond of having done but something he's sure is more up Gabriel's alley -- but he doesn't want to be the one to mention it.

Sam leads Gabriel to the car, and Gabriel slides into the shotgun side without a word. Sam takes his seat behind the wheel, and he tosses one more wary look at the archangel before turning the car on. Gabriel just stares out the side window, his face expressionless. Sam longs for a way to comfort him, to make him feel at least a little better, but he can't.

So he just drives.

The hum of the engine disrupts the silence for the first few minutes, but it doesn't take long for it to fade into the background. It gets to the point where Sam is almost considering turning on the radio just for something to listen to, something to make this ride just a little less awkward, even if the radio is doubtlessly going to be set to a classic rock station that Dean would kill him if he changed. The only thing stopping him is the fear that it would make Gabriel uncomfortable. He's so clearly not in a good place right now. Sam doesn't want to make it worse.

Eventually, Sam asks, "Are you going to be okay?" just for something to break the silence. It's a dumb question, sure, but he's not sure what else to ask.

Gabriel lets out a long breath. "I always am."

"Is there anything I can do?" Sam asks.

"No."

Sam frowns. He wasn't really expecting anything different, but he'd at least hoped for more of a response. He'll just have to try again.

"Is there anything you're going to want at the bunker?" Sam asks. He'd get Gabriel just about anything he wants if it would cheer him up.

"No."

Or not. He can't just do nothing, though. He racks his brain for something else to offer. "I can drag Dean out of your way when we get back. I know he can be a bit much to deal with." And god knows Dean won't just leave him alone. He never does.

"Don't bother," Gabriel says.

Before Sam can say anything else, Gabriel reaches across and turns the radio on. Sam was right; it is playing a classic rock station that Dean would kill him if he changed, and he knows it's a classic rock station because he would recognize the song it's playing from a mile away: Asia's "Heat of the Moment."

Sam cracks a smile. He's not sure whether Gabriel did that on purpose or if it's just a weird coincidence, but it's a funny type of unexpected. He glances at the archangel, expecting some sort of similar reaction, but Gabriel is just back to staring out the window, expressionless once again. The smile falls from Sam's face. There was a time when he would have thought nothing could ruin Gabriel's mood. Now, he's not sure he'll ever see the old Gabriel again.