Wanted

Thirty [Part Two]

*Two updates because I had the most bomb workout and I'm sore as hell so I can't do sht else for right now lmfao.

August

I walked up the stairs to my apartment, attempting to get my high under control before I walked in. I adjusted my shades on my nose, fishing my keys from my pocket.

I unlocked the door, letting it swing open. I kicked my shoes off and hung my keys up on the key hooks, one of the many improvements Kai's made since she's been here.

Closing the door behind me, I locked both of the locks and put the chain on it. I took my hat off, passing the kitchen, walking to the living room where Kai was on the sofa cuddled up with a blanket and a bowl of popcorn watching TV.

"Hey, you." I gave her a real smile, plopping down next to her.

"Hey." She replied never looking from the TV.

"How did court go?"

Kaimana sighed heavily before using the remote to turn the TV down. She reached forward placing the bowl on the coffee table. She looked at me, running her hand across the back of her neck with worry in her eyes.

"It was fine, I mean, I guess it was. They're putting him through a trial."

"When?"

"Soon. The next court date is in two weeks and I'm just so worried."

"About what? 'Dat nigga gon' get what he deserves, baybeh girl."

"I know." Kai balled her lips, inching closer to me. "I'm just worried about Dy'mond. She shouldn't have to be testifying, in and out of courtrooms at all. Definitely not at such a young age, who knows what it'll do to her."

"I unda'stand, but you strong, maw and so is she. Y'all will be aight."

"I know. I worry so much, I just-I just need you."

Kai looked at me and her eyes still held the same look but they also held a glint of hope and love. I swallowed in guilt because I knew it was for me.

"I'm here." I wrapped my arms around her.

"No, August. I mean I need you to be here the whole time, when I get weak I need you to be that strength. In a world that hasn't show me much mercy I need you to be that love and mercy on me. In a room full of lies I need you to be-to be that honesty and truth in my life."

I loudly exhaled, looking at the ceiling because I couldn't look in her eyes. Not knowing I had been lying to her.

It was different than looking in Yasmin's eyes and lying to her, it's actual difficult for me to lie and look in her eyes because I actually care about her.

It's impossible for me to be okay with deceiving Kai, ever. It hurts me to know I'm hurting and hiding things from her. I can't even say I'm protecting us because truth is I'm protecting myself because I don't wanna lose her.

Selfish? It is but I don't know how else I can keep from losing her.

"I always will, Kaimana. I promise, baby." I honestly told her, kissing her forehead.

"Thank you." She looked up at me with a brighter glint in her eyes and the most beautiful smile on her face.

My heart dropped. I told the truth but somewhere in that truth the things I've been hiding were still being masked.

--

"Girl, you cannot cook better than me, stop!" I joked playfully nudging Kai away from me with my shoulder as I mixed some hot wings in a bowl.