polaris black is not a bad person, she promises. she's got blood on her hands, sure, but she's not bad.
she doesn't do feelings, not anymore. so when james potter comes around with his smile and his eyes and his love, she is determined not to let h...
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POLARIS, 16, SOAKING WET AND SHIVERING, shakes as she knocks on her eldest sisters door. It's the middle of the night, endless droplets of rain pounding down against the pavement. Polaris can hardly breathe, the strict corset of her dress doing nothing to help her stuttered breaths. She doesn't even know if she's at the right house, they all look the same and she can hardly see anything through her tears.
As the minutes tick by, with still no answer, Polaris sinks down onto the doorstep, the tears running down her cheeks becoming muddled with rainwater. She shouldn't be crying, this is what she was born to be. This is her purpose in life, what else is there?
But if that's the case, then why does it hurt so much?
She knows she shouldn't be here. If she's caught, it's basically a death sentence. She should be at the Manor, asleep. She should not be on her disowned and disgraced sisters doorstep, looking like she'd been dragged through a hedge backwards.
( for the record, she would have taken being dragged through a hedge backwards over her current situation! )
Yet here she sits, knawing on her thumbnail. She'll have bitten her nails to stubs by the time she gets back, and that'll be problem number forty-four! Just another thing she'll have to worry about.
"Look, it's the middle of the night, what are— Polaris?" Andromeda Tonks answers the door at long last, baby blue dressing gown wrapped tightly around her slim frame, squinting through the rain to make out the figure on her doorstep.
"I— I— I'm s-sorry," Polaris hiccups. "I- I didn't— I didn't know where t-to go." She stumbles to her feet, taking a few steps backwards from her sister. Andromeda's face fills with concern, and she pushes some hair out of her tired eyes.
"Come in," she says gently. "Let's get you sorted okay?"
"N-no, I— I shouldn't have— I need to—" Polaris clutches her head, taking a few steps backwards.
"Come inside Polly," Andromeda says, her tone soft but firm. "You'll catch your death of cold out here." Polaris shakes her head, biting her lip and wringing her hands.
"No, you won't want me here when you— I didn't want to Andy, they— they—" Polaris' teeth chatter between her broken sentences, and she feels like she could pass out any second.
"Polaris, please come inside," Andromeda says. "I won't be angry, I promise."
"Don't." Polaris shakes her head, taking a few more steps backwards. "Don't make promises you— you can't keep."
Andromeda steps out into the night, slipper clad feet trying to avoid the puddles accumulating along the path.
"Polaris, please come in," Andromeda says. She fishes her wand out of her pocket and points it upward, a silvery umbrella forming at the end of it. "It's okay."
