Separate But Equal

F**k It All

I didn't want to be here, I shouldn't be here. Walking past my locker I hear, "Oh look who's back cause she couldn't make it at the ghetto school." If only they knew. I felt a hand grab my butt through my skirt. No, please not on my first day back, I turned around to see none other than Dylan Abrams, and his flunkies. These were the guys I told Chris about, they've been bothering me like this since I was thirteen. It's part of the reason I acted on my feelings for Langston, I thought they'd leave me alone if he came in the picture, but it only got worse.

"Awww you missed us so much you came back?" He asked caressing my cheek. I slapped his hand away.

"Don't touch me." I said through gritted teeth.

"Look at that boys she got a little fiesty while she was away. Don't worry we'll get that right out of you." I sped away from them as soon as the bell sounded. This is what Selena and Clint caused by not telling us what would happen. This is what Langston caused by telling my dad about us. I have no way of getting in touch with Chris. My dad still has my phone, and we're too far from each other for the mind link to work. I did all my work ignoring the snobby hoes trying to call me out about being back at Sacred Jewels. Now back for my worst subject, gym, not because I'm lazy, but because I always end up taking it with Dylan and his goons. I sit on a bleacher by myself isolated from everybody until Dylan sits next to me. The coach isn't paying attention, because he's talking to the basketball team right now. Before I can think about getting up, Dorian, Dylan's friend holds my body in place. Dylan slides his hand towards the hem of my knee length uniform skirt.

"Make a sound, and you'll regret it." He gestured for me to follow him, and I helplessly did. They cornered me in the janitors closet, I felt the tears streaming down my face before they even touched me. I slumped in the corner as they advanced on me. The door burst open letting light in, but I didn't bother looking to see who it was.

"Keep your damn hands off her!" That voice, it can't be. I stayed huddled in the corner, I felt an arm around me.

"Zah it's ok." I clung to the body making sure it was really them.

"Honey!" She held me a little more before pulling me to my feet.

"In the flesh, Chris told me they sent you back. I convinced mom to enroll me back here. Ain't no way I'm letting Dylan and his punk ass friends molest you." For some reason they were afraid of Honey, been that way since 1st grade. I hate that I'm taking Honey away from Ty and the crew, but I'm glad I have somebody here to fight for me.

"Here." She put something in my hand. It was a phone, nothing big, just an old flip phone.

"Why?"

"It's prepaid, I know your dad took your phone, this is the best one I could get you seeing as it's so old nobody would be able to track it." She was kinda right, I immediately saved everybody's number. The first person I text was Chris.

Me: Babe?

Chris: Who this?

Me: Zah.

Right after I sent that he was calling me, I answered it with no hesitation.

"Hello?"

"Are you okay? They not fucking with you? They treating you right? Please be ok?" He was so frantic asking questions, I knew he'd be worried about me.

"I'm fine, yeah they're treating me right, nobody's bothering me." Lie, lie, and lie, but I don't want to tell him what happened.

"Good." He breathed out. "I miss you."

"I miss you too."

"We're still doing it." He spoke answering my unasked question, I really want to be as far away from this war as possible.

"You sure."

"Positive, after that shit they pulled, taking, and jerking you around like you some damn doll I don't want you nowhere near them. We're getting out of here." I nodded like he could see me.

"Promise?"

"I promise, I love you." I knew it was time for him to go to his next class so we couldn't talk long.

"I love you too." I hung up feeling the hurt all over again. The rest of the day it was like I wasn't even here, my body was, but my soul, spirit, and heart were somewhere else. I've never felt so lifeless in my life. Thank God this is over, well at my first day back at this hell hole is over. Since my dad won't let me drive my car, and there's no way I wanna be in a car with him or Julian I take the bus home.

"Hey Zahra." My dad speaks as I walk in the house, I ignore him like I've been doing for the past few days, and go upstairs to my room. I finished my homework, and called Chris.

"Hey gorgeous." I could hear his smile.

"Hey, how was school?"

"Straight had run in with your brother." I rolled my eyes at the mention of Julian.

"About what?"

"Apparently I turned you against the family, I'm never gone see you again, it's a price on my head, pure bullshit basically."

"Man this sucks, all because of Langston we're forced away from each other." I sighed out.

"I know, heard they got you under lock and key there?"

"They do, no car, no phone, Honey gave me this prepaid phone so that's what I'm using to talk to you." I heard rapping at my bedroom door. It was my dad, I whispered telling Chris I'd call him back.

"Come in." He walked in sitting at the foot of my bed.

"Next time let me in without all the attitude in your voice." I sucked my teeth, ignoring his comment.

"Dad, what do you want?"

"Here." He handed me my phone.

"I deleted that damn Lords number."

"He has a name, and he's more than a Lord." I tried reasoning.

"He's the enemy Zahra!" He yelled.

"No he's your enemy!" I yelled standing on my knees on my bed.

"Don't raise your tone at me little girl!"

"Fuck that! My entire life I've only ever known the life of a Guardian, and that the Lords are our enemies since before I was born. Because of this I've been walking on egg shells not trusting anybody that wasn't a Guardian, not even being in a relationship because of this." I left out the Langston thing for obvious reasons.

"But the minute I get happiness with a guy it gets snatched away because he just so happens to be a Lord!!! That's messed up."

"Baby girl, it's not..." I cut him off.

"No Dad, save it! As far as I'm concerned, fuck everything! Fuck this war, fuck the Lords, and FUCK the Guardians!" I watch my dad leave my room disappointed at my words, but I don't care, I never thought I'd say that because the Guardians are family, but family is what hurt me. I crashed back into my bed cradling my pillow. I want Chris, I don't want anything else, but him. I want his arms holding me, his kisses, his love, all of it. Stupid war.