my blue (A.K x reader)

chapter 6

❌triggering chapter❌

March 6th 10 am

Wait? Awsten wants to me to come over for lunch holy shit no no calm down its not a date he doesn't like you that way hes probably just embarrassed for you and is gonna yell at you i shake away my thoughts and take the hoodie off putting a shirt on then the hoodie back on and walking across the hall i was scared to knock but suddenly the door opened to a smiling awsten "morning neighbor" he looks at me "hey awsten im sorry about yesterday i don't know what happened i just-" he cuts me off "don't apologize i wanna apologize for not making you feel safe enough that you panicked" i tilt my head "i felt safe i just dont like when people stare at me and i kinda got freaked out" he just nods and lets me in "listen i felt bad so i made us lunch sadly i can't cook that well so we're having sandwiches" i laugh and nod "ill teach you too cook my dads a chef so i know alot about cooking and working the kitchen" he nods and sits down infront of me "so i see your wearing my hoodie" i nod smiling "i see you left it for some reason" he laughs and nods "yea i knew you were having a hard night and i call it my lucky hoodie and i figured you need it more than me" he smiles i feel butterflys in my stomach whats this feeling? Its weird i dont know how to feel about it what do i do "you ok?" Awsten looks into my eyes i quickly nod "yea yea just thinking like always" he nods and we eat talking "so you like waterparks" i nod smiling "yea i do" he takes a sip of his orange juice and sets it down ❌"why? Like how come you like it so much it's obvious you do" i take a deep breath "ok well a few years ago i was in a bad relationship they cheated and would blame it on me but because i didn't wanna be a cause of a suicide i didn't leave and it got to the point where i wanted to kill myself and i would sit in the bathtub and just cry and one day i was on youtube trying to cheer up and i came across stupid for you so i started listening and soon waterparks became an escape and soon the cuts faded into scares and i soon left i rember worrying for weeks after that he was gonna kill himself but hes still alive to this day i know because he always find my number no matter how many times i change it" he gets up and hugs me tightly rolling up my sleeves i panic a little but soon i see him kiss the scars "no matter the scars it means you won a battle and that makes your skin even more beautiful so don't let anyone tell you they're ugly i think they make you look stronger" ❌ soon we sit back down and go back to talking

☆awstens point of view☆

This poor girl has been through so much i guess that weve both been through something similar no wonder she always wears long sleeves is she afraid someone will judge....i Hate people who judge they have no right they dont know what people have been through and im glad she trusts me enough to reveal that "hey awsten?" I click out of my thoughts and look at her "promise you won't tell anyone only you and ty know and im not even sure why i said that i usually stay so quiet when it comes to this" i put my finger on her nose "i promise my heart no one else will know not otto not geoff no one" she smiles and looks down "thanks for having me over awsten i had alot of fun and honestly it feels nice to have someone to hang out with other than ty" i nod "of course i know how lonley it can get sometimes and i just wanna make sure your staying happy" she smiles "as long as i have waterparks ill be the happiest person ever" i laugh "so how come you called me blue yesterday" she licks her lips "well like i said waterparks made me happy when i was sad and so i had a hard time expressing emotion so id say colors blue ment sad and so waterparks or you took the blue away so i always referred to you as blue to my friends and I guess i just let it slip" i took her sadness away? Im her blue? God shes been through so much and im glad im the one that helped fix it "i rember the song i would listen to most was lucky people i loved the video cause i used to live close to new york city and i rember the lights would make me feel safe and the song just made me smile i zone out and when i zone out i get writing ideas so id listen to waterparks and start writing so most of my books we're written while i was listening to waterparks" i grab her hand she looks at me "im glad i made the hard days better thats why i became a singer to make people feel better on days they felt alone cause feeling alone isn't fun i know it i feel alone still but no one needs to know i don't want them worrying" she looked like she was gonna cry so i quickly pulled her into my arms "thank you blue for trusting me and telling me encouraging words i really needed that today" i draw circles on her back "hey anything for a yellow" she looks up at me "a yellow?" I nod "someone who lights up a room no matter how sad they are someone who cares more about others than themselves someone who just wants to make life the best they can" i saw tears drip down her face u wipe them away with my thumb "don't cry yellow your safe here always ok? If you ever feel scared or alone come over we can watch movies sing do whatever we can even have a sleepover cause your yellow im blue together were green" she looks at me "are you trying to hide the fact your quoting stupid for you" i laugh and nod "i really cant fool a waterparks fan can i" she shakes her head laughing at me "no blue you cant see ive been listening to you for years i memories every song and lyric you cant fool me" i laugh as we pull away from the hug "thanks awsten for lunch" i nod and start cleaning "do you want help?" She walks over to me "no no i got it you have work so get" she laughs "do you want your hoodie back atleast?" I shake my head "i gave it to you because you need it more keep it safe yellow ok?" She nods and walks out i can't believe we did that....does she like me? Do i like her fucking damnit what is this feeling i hate it but i love it god i don't want it to stop ever