I lied against the pillows on my bed as I got some last minute writing in before Jim's basketball practice. He had invited me to come along, and I was just waiting for him to get changed. I paused my actions as I heard the distant fighting becoming louder than before. My stomach dropped as my mom's voice was sharper than usual, jumping when Jim climbed through my window. He was in a pair of black basketball shorts and a dark grey t-shirt, me grateful that the arguing had ceased.
"Hey," he grinned, me relieved that it was obvious he wasn't currently high.
"Hey," I echoed, standing in my jeans with a red and white striped shirt.
"Are we going to meet up with your parents out there?" He nodded towards my door as I shook my head, pressing my lips together as I tried to act normal.
"Um, no, they're not coming today."
"What do you mean they're not coming? They come to practically everything," he faintly laughed, giving me a nice smile.
"They're just not coming today. It's just you and me today. You know, we don't have to do everything together. I'm a teenager. It was weird we went so many places together anyway."
He furrowed his eyebrows as he gently grabbed my arm before I could exit through the open glass pane. "Is everything okay, Zoe?"
"Yeah, everything's fine," I sighed, shrugging him off before climbing out.
"You know, it's not that weird you do so much with your parents. I've just never had anything like that before. It's great you have such a tight knit family-"
"Just drop it, okay," I snapped, hot tears pricking my eyes before I blinked them away. Our entire walk to the school was silent, me just simply watching Jim from the bleachers as his black converse squeaked across the floor. He requested to use the restroom after only 10 minutes, their coach, Swifty complaining about how small of a bladder Jim had. I patiently waited, noticing that Swifty went into the men's locker room, confused when he came out shortly with traces of blood below his nose. I rose as I spotted Jim storming out a side door, hurrying to follow him in the bright sun.
"Jim?! Hey Jim," I called, him looking at me with a hardened expression as he only turned his head.
"Where are you going? Isn't everyone going out for burgers? Swifty's buying."
"I wouldn't eat anything that guy pays for," Jim seethed, his chest rising and falling rapidly as anger bubbled to the surface.
"What do you mean? Swifty's a really nice guy," I said cluelessly, but hesitation was in my tone from Jim's reaction.
"I don't want you going anywhere near him alone, you got that? I don't want you even near him when people are around."
"Okay," I softly replied. "Did something happen? I saw that he had a bloody nose..."
"Nothing fucking happened, okay?!"
"Did you go in there to take, you know..."
"Zoe!" He held his closed fists as he squeezed his eyes shut, controlling his bad mood before dropping his hands in a sigh. "Look, let's just eat something at my place. My mom just went to the store yesterday."
"Okay," I agreed, jogging closer to where he was before we strolled home.
Jim was banging cabinets as he retrieved peanut butter and grape jelly in the kitchen, noisily fishing a knife out of the drawer before grabbing the packaged loaf of bread. He wordlessly made my sandwich before working on his, us eating with only the ticking of a clock on the wall. Straight after Jim began wordlessly scribbling in his notebook at the kitchen table, his cheeks getting pushed out as he moved his tongue around to remove peanut butter that had gotten stuck in his mouth. I chanced screeching my chair directly beside his, pressing my chin against his shoulder as I allowed myself to wallow in my depressed mood. Jim had no idea the trouble that had been stirring in my household, and it hurt me that he was clearly upset about something that happened today, but he wouldn't tell me about it. Jim glanced over at me through his side vision as his hand steadied, the drugs clearly wearing off, since I just knew he had sniffed stuff earlier at practice.
My heart fluttered and was filled with warmth at the same time when I heard Jim softly singing the more recent song I had learned on my piano.
"Put your head on my shoulder
Hold me in your arms, baby
Squeeze me oh so tight
Show me that you love me too
Put your lips next to mine, dear
Won't you kiss me once, baby
Just a kiss goodnight, maybe
You and I will fall in love..."
He didn't finish as he strained his head to meet his eyes with mine, my hazel dancing between his blue as I smiled happily. "I thought you didn't sing," I pointed out.
"I don't, but I do with you," he shrugged, focusing on his sheet of paper again before securing half of his lower lip in between his teeth. He raised his eyes as he seemed to be thinking about something before facing me again. I then felt his lips brushing against mine before capturing them in a sweet kiss, pulling away shortly after as the small sound filled the air.
"What was that for," I wondered, sounding just like him when I first gave him a kiss.
"I guess I just wanted to help you feel better," he softly spoke, me resting my forehead against his as I fluttered my eyes closed.
"Thank you, Jim... I have another song for you..." I then proceeded in singing one of Aretha Franklin's greatest hits, a rosy blush entering Jim's cheeks.
"Looking out on the morning rain
I used to feel so uninspired
And when I knew I had to face another day
Lord, it made me feel so tired
Before the day I met you
Life was so unkind
And you're the key to my peace of mind
'Cause you make me feel
You make me feel
You make me feel like a natural woman"
"Will you sing with me, Jim," I whispered.
"I'm not singing that," he almost laughed after hearing the chorus, his smile falling due to our close proximity.
"Then dance with me," I requested in the same low volume, rising from my seat as he stared up at me before accepting my hand. We both slow danced around the miniature kitchen as we kept nearly bumping into furniture. What was strange was I wasn't sure if Jim and I would be classified as just friends anymore, but it was nothing we ever discussed, and we rarely if ever initiated a kiss unless we were down about something. If my feelings told the story though they would be screaming that I'm blindly, slowly falling for my best friend.
A/N: Hey guys, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. The songs I used were "Put Your Head On My Shoulder" by Paul Anka, and also "(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman" by Aretha Franklin. Please remember to comment, vote, and follow. Thank you! <3
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I'll Be Good || Jim Carroll
Fanfiction"I thought I saw the devil this morning, looking in the mirror, drop of heroin in my blood with a warning to help me see myself clearer. I'll be good for all of the times that I never could."
