Wanting to Remember, Trying to Forget (Meet the Shepards, #1)

December

Max secured the shopping bags around his wrists and hands and continued marching through the mall. Christmas was around the corner and they were leaving for Montana next week. It was not the last minute Christmas shopping or the stuffy, crowded mall that made him edgy. It was the fact that he was going to tell Danny the truth today.

He had readied himself a few times to tell her and backed out at the last minute. He was nervous about her reaction. He knew she loved him. She had told him so a hundred times already. He had been waiting for her to feel like she had just as much to lose, but the fact that she loved him actually made the situation a whole lot worse.

How was he going to look into the eyes of the woman who loved him and say:

So, yeah...I've been lying to you since the minute we met and technically we were never dating because you were in love with someone else and you only ever saw me as a friend so I took advantage of your memory loss, pretended to be your boyfriend, and lied to you every single day for eight months. Oh, and by the way, just in case you thought that wasn't bad enough. You were a virgin, saving yourself for someone special and because of my teeny, tiny white lie, we ended up sleeping together, but you love me so all that's okay, right?

How the fuck was he going to say that to her? There was a one-in-a-million chance that she would forgive him but even if she did look past the lie, he doubted that she would be able to trust him again. He regretted doing this for so long. This confession should have been done months ago, but she was going to meet his family next week and he could not postpone it any longer. Bringing his family into this lie was not an option and with the sheer size of his family, someone - probably Shane - was bound to fuck up.

So today was the day he was going to get it all out in the open. He was leaving sufficient time for forgiveness before their trip so she would not feel obligated to come along. Once he told her everything, he was determined to rebuild her trust and then hopefully they could put it all behind them. A fresh start to the New Year, a new beginning with no secrets or lies.

Max looked back and let out a frustrated breath when he saw Danny behind him, stopping at the window of every store to look inside.

"Danny, can we please get a move on? I have a few more presents to buy and then I want to get outta here."

"Okay," she said, quickening her steps to catch up to him. "No need to get so grumpy, Sugarpie."

She smiled and the aggravation melted. "One of those gifts are for you, by the way."

Her eyes lit up. "What are you getting for me?"

"It's a surprise so you need to make yourself scarce while I pick it up."

She pouted her lips and stared up at him with puppy-dog eyes. "You don't have to wait for Christmas."

"Yeah, that's not gonna work."

She dropped the manipulative smile. "Fine. How long are you going to be?"

"Probably a while. Still have to get something for my dad and Dom. They are impossible to buy for."

"Okay. I'm gonna go to the beach for a while and then I'll meet you back at home."

Max wanted to argue because he didn't want her walking alone, but the beach seemed like a good idea. It may put her in a better mood before he broke the news to her and the mall, the beach and their apartment were all in close proximity so he agreed.

She lifted up on her toes and kissed him. His hand slipped to the small of her back. "I love you," he whispered in her ear.

"I love you, too," she said before she turned and walked away.