Victor Fuentes One Shots

Four

**TRIGGER WARNING, THIS CHAPTER WILL DEAL WITH DEPRESSION, SELF HARM, DEMONS, AND SUICIDAL THOUGHT**
*First person. You've been feeling low because you want to come off your meds but you're scared of what might happen if you do*
Words: 898

I looked desperately from the bottle of pills in my hand to the mirror above my bathroom sink. My reflection was warped due to the tears that slipped down my cheeks and blurred my eyes. With trembling hands I placed the bottle on the sink and leaned my forehead against the cool glass of the mirror.  
“God.” My voice was barely a whisper. “I don’t want to do this anymore.” I leaned slowly back from the mirror and turned the taps on quickly, splashing cold water into my face with a gasp. Now I was properly crying, the tears running without control, gasping hiccupped breathes escaping my lips. My head whipped up as the door banged downstairs and a shout from my best friend, Vic, floated up the stairs. Hurriedly I scrubbed at my eyes and rolled down the sleeves on my hoodie, glancing at the thick white scars there. I turned to go to the door but as I did I caught sight of my reflection again. My skin pale, dark hollows around my eyes and chapped lips. My hair dull and limp around my face. I choke caught itself in my throat and then hot tears were spilling down my face. I slipped slowly down to the sink to the floor and stayed there in a heap, my shoulders shaking as sobs racked my body. I buried my face in my knees, trying to stay quite. Three minutes Vic was knocking at the locked bathroom door.
“Y/n? Y/n are you in there?” He asked. I gulped down a mouthful of air but when I tried to speak my voice shook so I stopped. “Y/n? Please let me in. I need to know you're okay.”  I sobbed again at his words. Vic deserved so much better than me. He was too sweet, to nice and too caring to have to deal with me. A failure, a disaster, a complete catastrophe. “Y/n listen to me. You need to open that door so I can come in. Please. I'm begging you to open the door.” There was a hint of panic in his voice now and it made guilt chew at me. Standing up I stumbled to the door and rested my palm against it.
“I'm fine Vic. Please, just go down stairs. I’ll be there in a minute.” My voice was strained and cracked more than once.
“No. I'm not going until you open this door.” I should have known that Vic would never go until he saw me. I shuddered lightly and sighed. I lifted my hand and slid back the lock. The handle was pushed down from the other side and then Vic’s concerned face appeared in the gap as he push the door slightly. He took one look at my face and stepped inside the bathroom wrapping his arms around me tightly, bringing on another wave of sobs. I buried my face in his chest and he stroked my hair as we sunk to the floor together. He took my face gently, making me face him. “Tell me what’s going on.” I shut my eyes as he spoke and took a deep breath. I owed Vic so much. Telling him what was on my mind, being completely honest, was the least could do.
“It’s the pills.” I whispered. “I can’t, I really can’t take them anymore. They make me feel like monster.” Now I was talking I couldn’t stop. “Like a freak, because I have to talk a stupid pill every day to keep me sane, to keep out the demons, to stop me from losing it because I'm not normal. Because if I'm not on some drug-” I spat the word “I put myself and other people in danger and need locking in a white room with no sharp objects, no high ledges, ropes or meds. They don’t make me happy or feel like a don’t want to die.” I sobbed. “They just make me too scared to do anything about the urges.” Vic was silent when I stopped talking for a minute before he worked out what to say.
“Y/n I don’t know what to say to you to make you feel better right now, but I promise that I’ll be here until we sort this out. You're not a monster. You're not a freak and you're not going insane. You're my amazing, so much stronger than anyone else ever, best friend and I need to trust me. Okay?” He asked. I smiled slightly at him, he words acting like a watery ray of sunshine though my world of darkness.
“Okay.” I whispered. He smiled back at me and wiped the tears off my cheeks before holding me tight again. His arms tight around me, my head against his steady heart beat and his lips moving softly against my hair as he murmured things I couldn’t quite decipher but it comforted me to hear his voice. Curled together like that against my bathroom wall I fell asleep, my best friends arms keeping me safe.  

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