Infinity Minus One (Inanimate Insanity)

Crappy Halloween

Like, seriously, MePhone? A 1-in-the-morning wake-up call for a challenge?

As the other Chickenleggers tumbled around in the autumn leaves, Pepper slumped lazily against a nearby lemon tree, carving out a pumpkin still dripping with a coat of purple paint that she'd applied. Or was it pink paint? In the darkness, she found it hard to tell, but she marvelled at her masterpiece all the same.

When Pepper wasn't occupied with her pumpkin, she was gazing off at the haystacks where Team Fabulous' elimination was taking place. One by one, she watched them have candy corns pelted at them - she gripped the pumpkin harder as Salt fell into the bottom two...

Oh, she got her prize. Pepper sighed and focused her attention back to the ground as a green cloud appeared out of nowhere and engulfed Bomb.

***

"...I've hidden a lot of candy around the island," explained MePhone, once everyone had gathered around. "You have to get as many pieces of candy as you can and keep them in this bag."

Pepper caught the bag haphazardly thrown at her and fidgeted with it. Loads of candy, use this bag, that's all she needed to know. She turned around to get a look at the rest of her team as they split off into their own little cliques. First, she saw Taco waddling away under Baseball's watchful eye, and she smirked. If Taco could spit up lemon candies, they'd have this challenge in the bag.

Who else was there? Oh. Pepper glowered at Balloon as he bounded off to who cares where. Of all the people to be brought back into the game, why not someone like Nickel, who was armless, but actually gave a dang about Halloween? Why that nasty blob of hot air?

Lastly there was that new Apple kid. Pepper's eyes lingered on her for a while - as well as who she was focusing on.

What was she doing with someone from the other team?

Pepper marched on over to see Marshmallow making conversation with Apple, or trying to at the very least. What she heard was less of a dialog, more of awkward, squeaky semi-stammering on Marshmallow's end. Annoying.

"I have no idea what you mean," Apple cut in at some point.

"I-I mean, is that really unusual for you?" Marshmallow rubbed the back of her head. "Maybe I can explain later! In the meantime, uh- good luck gathering candy and not trash or something."

"Trash...?"

Lightbulb grabbed Apple's arm. "Now hold up, she can totally tell the difference."

"It's hard to know with that one sometimes," Marshmallow deadpanned.

Lightbulb gasped like a diva. "I see how it is. I hope YOU gather nothing but trash- if your talk ain't a can full of it already!"

Lightbulb dragged Apple away from the conversation, leaving Marshmallow with such a stupid, surprised expression on her face. Pepper rolled her eyes; should really teach her to mess with my team.

"Pepper, I'm tired. I was supposed to be asleep, like, two hundred twenty-three minutes ago."

Pepper turned around and saw Salt. And what a sight she was; she looked great even without her beauty sleep.

Hanging out with the other team couldn't hurt too much, could it?

Not missing a beat, Pepper quipped, "And, like, what's the point of this challenge anyway? Our diet doesn't have room for candy."

Salt gasped in a way that could have sounded forced to anybody but Pepper. "You... are so right!"

"Let's just skip this one. We've both totally earned some time off," Pepper affirmed, praying Salt would agree. Luckily, she clasped Pepper's hand and dragged her towards the nearest tree.

"Darling, you made the right call. I have so much I need to fill you in on." As Salt was talking, she gesticulated. A lot. Her free hand kept getting uncomfortably close to clocking Pepper around the head several times, but it was all small potatoes. Free time with Salty Salt made anything bearable!

***

Literally anything!

"...and, like, can you believe Pickle said that to ME?! Pickle, of all people? The guy doesn't even deodorize and he smells like rotten vinegar!" Salt babbled on and on about the recent misadventures of her team, and Pepper hung onto every word.

Her elegance was as effortless as breathing or complaining about other people to her. Every word Salt uttered tonight was so powerful, so passionate! It was no wonder Salt was able to lead Team Fabulous so... well, fabulously; she spoke her mind.

Pepper opened her mouth to talk all about one especially dumb thing Knife did, when Salt interrupted herself. "Oh, and don't even get me started on that Marshmallow girl."

Pepper closed her mouth; Knife's brutish actions could wait. "Like, what about her?"

"She's, like, so self-important. Always going off and doing her own thing. I can't even, like, get a proper read on her!" Salt continued.

As Pepper nodded along to everything Salt said, her eyes scanned the playing field again. She watched Baseball and Taco empty a few candies each into MePhone's bin before sharing a hi-five and leaving again rather promptly. Seriously? That wasn't a big enough yield to celebrate! Team Chickenleg needed more!

She didn't notice them dropping some sludgy trash into Marshmallow's sack.

Oh, right, something something Marshmallow. Pepper snorted. "Oh, yeah, that. She's got a habit of talking-" Pepper started before getting drowned out again.

"Talking to your teammates, right! Who does she think she is, the alliance master or something?!"

"Yeah, girl. This is my team, not yours. Stop obsessing over my peeps and go pick on someone your own size," Pepper quipped.

Salt giggled. This giggle grew into quite the belly laugh as she wiped a tear from her eye. "Oh, Pep," she wheezed. "You're just the funniest!"

Pepper's smile widened, and her eyes softened up. The conversation entered a lull, and both shakers went silent. Pepper's mind raced as she tried to think of some equally witty jab to make at Marshmallow. Salt was right; who did she think she was, coming onto her turf and trying her hand at mind games, huh? Only Pepper was allowed to do that -

"Whoa! Team Chickenleg, congrats!" exclaimed MePhone out of the blue, jolting Pepper back to the there and then. In front of her she saw their team's bin filled to the brim with all sorts of candy, and next to that, Apple and Lightbulb sharing an awkward fist bump that took a few tries to perfect. "You guys got 235 pieces of candy!"

"See, Appy? That's how us Chickens do things 'round here," Lightbulb chuckled, putting an arm on Apple's head. Apple's smile remained bright despite the bite marks all over her.

Not bad, rookie, thought Pepper. Not bad at, like, all.

"As for Team Fabulous, you would have gotten more points if Marshmallow hadn't brought back garbage," MePhone continued, raising an annoyed eyebrow in Marshmallow's direction.

Pepper's sly grin grew when she caught the mischievous glance that Baseball and Taco exchanged. No wonder they celebrated; what sweet, sweet comeuppance.

Marshmallow, for her part, looked like she'd just seen a ghost.

"Good news, Salty Salt," whispered Pepper. "If the viewers have half a brain, we'll have one less person to moan about."

"I, like, really hope so." Salt gave Pepper's hand a little squeeze.

Pepper's smile grew.

Every moment Salt decided was worth spending with her was a fabulous moment indeed. She truly had no idea what Salt saw in her, but as long as Salt thought she was worth something, Pepper would do everything in her power to prove her right.

To that end, Pepper's eyes kept being drawn back to Lightbulb and Apple. As the two of them celebrated their first victory together, her thoughts deepened. Two young, optimistic airheads who could stand their ground in challenges. Totally not big threats to her and Salt on their own. But if that lump of sugar wanted to play the manipulation game, then Pepper would have to get to them first.

Game on, loser.