The Gatekeeper

Part III Love Child Chapter 19

19

ALTHOUGH NEW YEAR’S EVE was vexing and taxing, Lauren did manage to finally let go of Kurt. Feeling free for the first time in months, she planned to move on with her life. The shackles of her codependent past were now lying loose at her feet. 

In the past, Lauren had to have a man in her life and the nature of the relationship was inevitably imbalanced. That changed. She liked being the one in charge, being in a position to take care of her needs without worrying about someone else's feelings. She was going to give Nick another chance, but only one more before crossing him off her not-deserving-of-me list.

During the next few days Kurt called to check up on Lauren. It was unusual for her not to be pestering him with calls so he knew something was up.

"Erik, hello, is Lauren around, I'd like to see how she's doing?"

"Actually no, she's out spending some time with a friend. Kurt, I hope you'll think this is good news. Lauren is seeing someone," I disclosed, not really knowing just how he would react.

"Oh . . . really . . . when did this happen?"

I could tell he was a touch put off.

"She met him a few weeks ago but they just started dating."

"I was wondering what was going on because Lauren hasn't been calling lately. I'm glad to hear she's getting on with her life. Thanks for filling me in," he concluded in a tone that I recognized as indicating he definitely had uneasy feelings about the situation. 

I wasn't trying to hurt him. Kurt insisted for months that he didn't love Lauren any more and wanted out of their relationship. Still, I could tell his reaction was filled with mixed emotions.

Wouldn’t you know it, after finding out Lauren was seeing someone, Kurt began pursuing her again. All of a sudden he was available to see her, kept appointments, and was on time. Although this pleased Lauren, she wasn't about to fall back into the codependent cesspool they both had been suffocating in. Nick was going to get his second chance while Kurt waited in the wings. 

NICK WAS BACK FROM business trip. Lauren had a few days to recover from the effects of her last flashback, but was still feeling weak when she asked Nick if he would come over. 

As he entered her room, there was reservation written all over his face. A wide smile, a warm hug, romantic words; none of these were part of his greeting as they met for the first time in several weeks. 

Lauren acted affectionately, but I sensed she was testing him. They spent some time alone together upstairs before coming down to see what I was up to. It was Super Bowl Sunday and the big game was on.

Nick, a guy and a sports enthusiast, was naturally interested in watching the game. Lauren had other ideas. She wanted attention, or at least she wanted to test his commitment and interest level. She sat on his lap in such a way as to distract him from a clear view of the game. 

"Come on Nick, I'm bored. Let's get out of the house and go for a ride," Lauren suggested, but in a demanding tone.

"That sounds good, honey, but how about after the game?" Nick replied without taking his eyes off the television screen as his team was about to score a touchdown. 

Normally I was very accommodating and selfless where Lauren's needs were concerned, but it did something to me watching Lauren lying across Nick's lap. The uncomfortable feeling surprised me. 

I was never jealous where Kurt was concerned. First of all, Kurt was Lauren's husband and I respected that. Then, there was the fact that Kurt came to me asking to take his place in the relationship, citing his lack of love for Lauren and his inability to cope with her problems.