"I sighed, putting the book back on the self. I walk over to my fireplace and sit next to it, putting my arms up making my hands heat up from the fire.
It's been a few weeks since they came, by them I mean my old crew. My house burnt down, Wilbur st...
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(Long boo so be prepared)
The night coming to an end, stars disappearing into the lively sky. The weird tingle stayed with me ever since I arrived. Sitting in front of the lake is quite relaxing now that I thought of it, the air being very cool and relaxing, flowing through my hair and in between my fingers as if the world was holding my hand, gently and smoothly.
"You doing good, Gum" A gentle voice said behind me. I could hear his coat flow in the wind as he walked next to me.
"Yeah, how are you Will" He sat down next to me with his arms holding him up and looking at the sky.
"If I'm being honest, I'm scared" my eyes widen. Scared, why would he be scared. He wants this, doesnt he? Am I just hearing this wrong
"Scared, why are you scared, you want this dont you?" I turn to face him. I try to look at his eyes but his were just glued to the sky.
I look up at the sky with him, staring at the stars, trying to predict what will happen.
"It's just that..." he brought he his head down and looked at his lap. "Its just that I dont know if we'll come alive out of this" his hands now layed on his lap as he stared at them, gentle caressing the palm of his hand. "No one can predict what will happen, we dont know if I'll die, if you'll die, or even Tommy."
I look down, gripping my pants as those words passed through me head. "Your right.." I take a little pause before saying anything else. Everything can end in an instant, in a blink of an eye.
Sure I killed people before I reunited with Phil and the rest but every single kill It made me more and more distant, it made me lose hope for my future. I always thought that i would be stuck in the same hole of killing everyone and not enjoying life to its fullest. My feelings were kept inside and hidden from anyone and everything but when Leo and the rest betrayed me I felt like I was gone. I felt like a tool with no emotion.
Tommy was right. I am just an emotionless tool everyone can thrown away in an instant. I cant believe I let myself go through this road. I'm not doing the right thing and I know it, i know that i can't. I'm not a god or goddess that everything thinks I am.
I'm just a person, who gives off emotions to the people I care about.
My happiness was taken away from me when I separated from my family and my emotions were destroyed when the village was burnt down. I thought everything was my fault. I thought everyone died because of me. Having the thought of the people who took me in died was the worst. Everything happened in a flash. I thought all of them died including my brother but now, I dont want my happiness or emotions to disappear.
I want to stay with the people who took me in, who gave me food, who gave me a bed to sleep on.
