The Birds & The Bees | S.R.

Ch. 8 | Professor's Pride

Summary: Spencer and Bunny have their first fight, and Candy's confrontation couldn't have come at a worse time.

Content Warning: Arguing, implied/inferred slut-shaming

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When I was a child, I found myself alone quite often. My mind made it both exceptionally easy and impossible to be alone. Despite it being far below my reading level, I often clutched tightly to Geisel's tale of how being alone would get you places if you can make it through the blue, barren landscape of the Slump.

As I've grown older, however, I realized that being alone was just as often a defense mechanism as it was a unique form of self-sabotage. Because truth be told, no matter how terribly I was treated when I offered someone a piece of my heart, I didn't want to be alone.

I met Bunny at a strange time. I'd only recently gotten used to being alone again. For the first time, I thought that it might be possible to be happy like that. Surviving through weekly meetings with old friends and removing myself from the vileness and gore of my old day job.

Penelope and Derek were quick to notice that I didn't need them around as often since I'd met her. I think they were equal parts enthused and concerned. I understood their apprehension; truthfully, the girl terrified me, as well.

But there was something different that day. A strange aura in the brightly colored apartment of Penelope Garcia. A place where badness rarely belonged.

I knew that it was coming the second that I walked in, but I had the decency and self-preservation to ignore the way she was clearly hyping herself up for a confession. After all, I had no secrets from the two people in the room with me. They knew everything about my life.

Enough to recreate it and predict what might happen given the opportunity. Enough to exploit. Enough to inflict maximum damage.

"Okay, so... don't get mad," were the words that signaled that very same idea.

I turned to Penelope, who refused to look me in the eyes. The warning signals in my mind began blaring, and I realized that there were few things in the world that would make her this nervous.

My mind immediately went to the young girl I'd taken under my wing, and my heart began to pound hard enough that I was afraid it would cease its nonsense altogether.

"What did you do?"

"Nothing, really. Nothing big."

I didn't believe her. While she could only maintain eye contact for a few seconds, I remained locked on to her eyes. I could feel Derek doing the same to me, but I wasn't willing to budge. He was making her tell me for a reason, and I wanted to know that, as well.

"I just— Morgan and I thought it would be interesting to see if we could find other people like you. Local people," she explained in the vaguest possible terms.

Narrowed eyes remained but switched from a building fury to a perplexed frustration.

"Why?"

"It doesn't matter. The thing is, we..." she paused. She turned back to Derek like he was her parent, imploring her to finish her apology to the kid whose pigtails she'd pulled. Eventually, she worked up the courage to finish the sentence with an awkward, bitter laugh, "We might have made you a dating profile."

"You what?!"

"We were going to delete it but... we..."

"You what?" I repeated, quieter but filled with the same level of rage.