Chapter Twelve

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Sometimes I wish I could just strangle people and get away with it, like the king of England. Over there, as long as it was an English citizen- he could stab them to death with a sword and get away with it. If it was somebody there on vacation or for school, he'd be in violation of international law.

But because he is a decent human being- he hasn't murdered anybody. It's a shame, really. Can you imagine how entertaining that would be?

Everybody in the room's waiting on me to say something, anything. What am I supposed to say?

"Sure, I know I've worked really hard to get here and all, that I'm the youngest president in history and people already think I'm weak despite the fact that they voted for me, but oh well. I'll resign because you said so, Doc."

No. I've never been one to follow instructions to a tea. I'm not going to start now, not when tensions with China are so high. To be fair- it was kind of our fault for bombing them. Now, we're just waiting on the retaliation.

Christ- if you'd told me about this while I was just a congresswoman, when I had no knowledge of the Illuminati or how our world really works, I would've called for the president's immediate resignation. I've always hated war- what's changed is that I now see it can be necessary.

Now, with resignation staring me down; a perfect opportunity to do so, I've got a feeling in my gut. I can't do this.

So I sit back, staring Dr. Ruth down with a pissed off expression that can only be compared to June in the handmaids tale. Truth be told she doesn't deserve it. She's just trying to do her job, at the end of the day- and she's the sweetest person ever.

"Excuse me?" I still can't hide the annoyance in my voice.

"It is not possible to do your job without being incredibly stressed out at all times." She repeats. "Bedrest helps a lot- but it can only do so much. You need to be able to ride through the pregnancy in a healthy environment."

"I'm not resigning."

"Madam President-"

"No!" I interrupt. "I'm not a fucking incubator! If the baby survives, good. If it doesn't, oh fucking well."

"That's not what I was saying-"

"That was exactly what you were saying." I look away, fuming- my nostrils flaring out every so slightly.

She seems tired, like she doesn't get paid enough to deal with my shit. Reminds me of my own mother, in the beginning. I was strongly opinionated from the second I came out of her womb, argued her into getting my way from the time I was two. Apparently I was amazing at it, because here I am.

I know what I should do for my health- but I know I won't. Time is too precious. Sitting in bed all day wastes it, no matter how much I can do over FaceTime and phone calls.

Before she leaves, knowing there's nothing she can say that'll convince me, she pauses. With her hand on the door, she makes eye contact. "Wait a few months. You'll get it then."

With that she leaves me alone with Ethan and Lilith. Oh boy. Here it comes again.

"I'll...leave you two alone." Lilith coughs, following Dr.Ruth down the hallway.

Instead of chiding me, he sits down on the doctor's table i'm laying on. Simply being around him has a calming affect. "I know what your going to say. No, I don't want our baby to die. Yes, I care. But no, I will not sacrifice my career for it."

"It?" He laughs.

"What's so funny?"

"That you think I'd ask you to give up your career I mean- seriously? Do you know me at all?"

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