Flowers of Spring

Everything I Wanted

Her room was pitch black and only the flashing lights coming from the TV illuminated the room. We were under a blanket and our bodies were close to each other. We held each other's hands in hiding. Her cat lied down on our feet.

The rain outside was relentless. Every now and then, thunder would flash on the window, and seconds later the reverberating clash would announce itself. It made our movie night cozier than it would be without rain, but at the same time, it made me feel slightly scared. Anna's emanating warmth was my safe haven. She was resting her head on my shoulder.

We were watching an old movie on her bed. It was called "Chinatown." An old noir film I didn't know existed. It was a movie I'd watch constantly if I had known. The plot was intriguing, the mystery was chilling, and the way it was filmed felt exactly the same as the book I had been reading. I found it interesting that Anna decided to put this movie on. She told me it was one of her favorites. I would've never expected her to like noir films but she was as fixated on the movie as me.

Another thunder clashed. I was caught by surprise and jumped.

Anna's head banged on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, I got scared."

She remained quiet. Instead, she put her arm around me. Her eyes never left the TV screen.

I have to say, I never thought I would need to go to a cardiologist at this early stage of my life. Anna made my heart beat so fast, my lungs had almost no time to oxygenate my blood. I was in a constant battle between my heart and my breathing. Taking deep breaths helped, but if I just kept breathing deeply all night, Anna might think I feel annoyed or bored or something. Then, if I held my breath, I sensed that my heart would just come out of my chest effortlessly. There was no way I could win.

Anna noticed and slithered her hand onto my chest. She pressed on my breast and felt the fast rhythm of my heart. Her hand seemed confused by the bra that was standing in her way. For a moment, I regretted I hadn't taken it off by now.

She chuckled when she noticed the heartbeat of an Olympic swimmer grasping at the palm of her hand.

"Is it the movie or ..."

"You're being a bully."

"I'm just asking."

"........."

"I counted 150 heartbeats."

"Stop it!"

Her mischievous chuckle.

"Are you liking the movie?"

"I really am. I didn't know you liked noir films."

"I do. I like them a lot."

"When did you first watch them?"

"... My mother used to play them for me when I was younger."

"She has good taste. I can't say I'm an avid fan, I recently discovered them, but I still haven't watched one I don't like."

"I can show you more some other day."

"Yes, I'd like that."

"We have a room full of films."

"Really? I wanna see."

"Tomorrow. My father is probably doing work there right now."

"Sure, no problem. What does he do exactly?"

"He's the C.E.O. of Worths Pharmacy."

"What? Really? You mean the pharmacies all over town?"

"Yes ... My father was born here. This was his family's estate."