"How the fuck do you call an uber from a payphone." Lance said, muffled, through the biting of his toenails in the back seat of this random as subaru. "I'm not an uber." The driver muttered. "Shut up immigrant." Lance yelped, throwing his toenail clippings at him.
Shiro wasn't paying attention to Lance at this point. They needed to find this Keith kid, and fast. Shiro easily got a hold of Lance's phone (Because Lance has lost complete sensation in his body after a twerking accident when he was 13) and he was scrolling for any sign of Keith. But it was as if him and Keith didn't even know each other, almost like they met once, and for some reason Lance was so idiotic that they were forever entangled.
"Lance... Do you not have Keith's phone number or-" Shiro began. "Hey there's Keith." Lance said, a sudden realization as he was sticking his foot out the window for it to dry. "What?" "Right there. Going into the titty club." Shiro swiped lance aside (That motherfucker made him cut his good foot on the window) and pushed open the door. Sure enough, there he was. That decrepit looking shrimp sulking into a strip club. "Lance, stay in here." Shiro barked, taking off at full speed, his hand edging towards the gun in his belt. "NO I WANNA SEE TITTIES!" Lance yelled, leaping out of the car. The two were hauling ass for that strip club. "No one's gonna fucking pay me? Man fuck American's. I'm going back to Italy." The driver muttered, pulling away.
The second Shiro pushed open the door, he was disoriented. The heavy sent of stripper perfume (You know the kind, you fucking dirty dog) wafted through the air, and the flickering of the neon lights were a direct contrast to the sunny and mild setting outside. There wasn't many people in there, but Keith was nowhere in sight. "Hey big guy, what can I get you today?" A young looking brittish girl sauntered up to him. Luckily, titties were not out, because as a gay man Shiro is not legally allowed to look at titties.
"I don't- I... I'm looking for somebody. Skinny guy, big... Big black hair. He just came in." Shiro muttered, avoiding eye contact. "Hmmm... No... I haven't seen any-" All of a sudden that piss ant Lance burst in. "KEITH I'M NOT GAY AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT." He yelled. The woman's face dropped. "Keith?" The woman asked. Shiro nodded. "Hmmm... You two know Keith then." She smirked. All Shiro heard was a loud bang, when he realized he had been shot in the chest. "Shit."
Lance's jaw dropped. "SHIT!" The brittish lady took aim at him next, but that lanky motherfucker is fast. He took off deeper into the club, past some empty booths, knocking shit over, trying to loose her the best he could. He came to a curtained off room, where he saw a completely naked woman just sitting there. Then, horror dawned over Lance. He felt nothing. No titilation over the sight of tits. He fell to his knees, sobbing. Then he felt someone yank him to his feet. "Kill me.... Just kill me please..." He sobbed. Then he was flipped around, and he way eye to eye with a familiar face."
"No...." Keith said, biting his lip. "Not yet." Lance got a boner again, but he had now reached the point in his life that he could admit that it was for homosexual attraction.
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Kitties and Titties (A Klance Fanfic)
Historical FictionIn this Klance AU, Lance lives in the peaceful town of Ann Arbor Michigan. He owns a local coffee shop, and is a proud cat/plant dad! But when mysterious and handsome Keith Kogane waltz's in through the shops doors, his life is forever changed! Find...
