So, This is Love💫 (Chenji AU)

💫18💫

Jisung cried.

He cried a lot.

He isn't the type to cry usually, but seeing his father's lifeless body before his eyes was too much.

"I'm so, so proud of you, Jisung, you're going to be a great king, son, I know it. I love you so much. I'm going to meet your mother again soon and tell her what a great son you have become. I've missed her so much." His father had smiled, his tired smile of so many years, one last time. His father had never been one to talk so freely about his feelings, but on his last days, he expressed himself as often as he could, as he knew that death was waiting for the right moment to embrace him.

"Take care of him, Chenle. I'm glad it got to be you and I'll tell my wife that I left Jisung in good hands, so promise me you'll take care of him." Jisung's father approved.

Chenle expresses his gratitude and Jisung expresses all of the feelings one would have for a great father.

They had called Jisung in by his father's wishes. His father had known these were his last moments and decided to spend them with his son and son-in-law. The words echoed in Jisung's ears as his father's body grew cold. He tried not to sob as he sat on his bed, knees weak, but after a while, Chenle pulled Jisung's body to his chest and he could no longer hold back. He clutched him as tight as he could, wanting to disappear forever, wanting to crawl into a ball and never have to face the world.

"You're not alone, Jisung." Chenle patted his back. "I know it feels like the world is ending. I know too well, but you still have family left. You still have all of your friends, and me."

"I know I do." Jisung mumbled, burying his face into Chenle's soft neck, not missing that Chenle had referred to himself as separate from a friend. Jisung had noticed, that although Chenle's hands were rough, most of the rest of his skin was softer than silk and it was pretty too, of course. He was his comfort character, his sweet and caring husband.

Chenle spent many days comforting Jisung. The boy cried almost everyday. He felt weak. Jisung had lost both his parents too, and he wished he could be as strong as Chenle. The older boy reassured him many times though, that he had grieved the same way. He was torn when his parents died too. When his mother died from her illness, he cried in his father's arms. When the news about his father passing got to him, he sobbed alone on the attic floor for days.

Chenle wanted to be there for Jisung. He didn't want Jisung to go through the loneliness and helplessness he had felt. Jisung didn't deserve that. Jisung was too precious to have to suffer,

But he did.

He felt his body grow weak with grief and his mind grow clouded with depressive thoughts. He would hardly leave bed or eat, but he did when Chenle made him. He could barely stand for a while, but Chenle kept him grounded enough to get his duties done.

It took a while, but finally, finally, came the acceptance that he needed to move on. It still made him sad to think about, but he had accepted the death of his father. During the days he was the saddest, Chenle had held him together, not allowing him to shatter into pieces. He slowly glued the shards of glass that were his being and made him feel.

Chenle was his strength, he realized. His friends added on their own form of strength, but not like Chenle's who understood. When he started feeling better he could see how he had begun to drain Chenle with his intense emotions. The kind boy seemed to be absorbing, like a sponge, everything he was emitting. Chenle wasn't as happy as usual on the days after his slow recuperation.

He woke up in the middle of the night one day to see Chenle's scrunched brow and tired face before him, his mouth releasing small whimpers from time to time. He must be dreaming something horrid as his breathing was ragged and Jisung could feel the rapid beat of his heart, as their bodies where pressed together. Jisung stared at the pale face before him and gulped. He realized all of the emotions he had let Chenle absorb from him and he thought to himself, he really didn't want Chenle to ever suffer and he was truly grateful for him.

He pressed kisses to Chenle's face and trapped his small hands in his, whispering a light, "wake up" after every few kisses. He nuzzled his forehead to Chenle's, when he felt the smaller one start to grip onto his hands too. Chenle barely opened his eyes, breath heavy. They stayed silent for a moment as Chenle took in his surroundings before speaking.

"I was having a bad dream, but I can't even remember it anymore."

"Mhm." Jisung sighed in relief.

"My heart probably won't slow down, though..." Chenle giggled cutely.

"Chenle..." Jisung held Chenle's face in his hands, admiring his beautiful husband. He thought to himself then, that he had made the right decision. There was nothing he would have wanted more. There was no one who could have been better.

"I think I love you." Jisung said, not completely afraid anymore. 

"You think?" Chenle smiled.

"I know, I love you."

"I love you too."

Jisung dipped close and pressed a kiss to Chenle's lips now. It was returned. Jisung trapped Chenle's bottom lip with his teeth and lightly tugged making Chenle squeak, but pull him closer. Jisung sucked on his lip, and Chenle realized where this was headed. He sighed into Jisung's mouth letting him have access, giving him permission.

The taller boy hovered above Chenle and trapped him underneath, kissing him like he had never done before. It was foreign to them both, but gave an addicting and intoxicating feeling. They moved with ardor and passion, slowly, but surely, shaky fingertips danced around. Jisung took control and Chenle let him. They had both always been the shy type, but their other emotions overpowered their insecurities.

They were now naked and stripped of their identities. No wealth or poverty written on their back, just their pure, vulnerable, warm bodies. They felt in their hearts that this was perfect. Chenle had always had wealth of a different currency that ran deep to his soul. Jisung had always been poor in spirit, felt as if he was missing something and now he had found it, here, in the bedroom that kept no secrets, the bedroom of vulnerability.

A touch reveals many truths and it was obvious what they were demonstrating to each other. Both were nervous, but continued on as they felt that they adored the others physical company and touches. They carefully caressed and kissed the intimate areas where neither had felt touch before. Their hearts picked up in pace and it was perfect as they sunk together in their bedroom of vulnerability

They wished they could live in this moment and pause it as the seasons went by. Chenle could feel every fiber of his body come to life, crumbling in the most perfect way beneath every single touch and he thought to himself,

"So, this is love?"

He knew it was. He knew he was in love. He had fallen more and more each day that he had risen. He had seen Jisung's flaws and he loved him despite all of them. He had seen all of the awkward edges of the boy and he still felt love for him. He still admired him and wanted to always be with him. He wanted to even argue with him, then kiss and make up, because he knew, even that was necessary in love.

"This is love."

This was what he had always dreamed of. His heart had wings and he could fly. He could reach the stars. This is what he had been waiting for, his most distant dream. He had tasted a slice of heaven on Earth.

"I'm in love."

And he knew, he was sure of it,

Jisung felt it too.