hidden feelings | chanlix

four.

'as long as he's happy.' is what felix said to himself the minute he found out that chan was dating sana.

you know him, he'd sacrifice everything for his best friend, even if it meant giving up his own happiness.

——

felix was always happy, smiling, and laughing when chan is around, which worried minho.

he knows his brother and the fact that felix is just doing this to cover up the pain he's really feeling inside.

when people are surrounding him, he's the sunshine boy everyone knows, but once left alone, he finally breaks down.

"hey lix- oh," minho passed by his brother's class to pick him and jisung up.

"shh!" jisung signaled his boyfriend to keep it his voice down.

its the 8th time this month that felix fell asleep during class, which mind you, never happens.

"i found him crying in the janitor's closet right before our third period..." jisung worriedly informed minho.

"again?" the older asked.

"clearly, he's hurting so much, he can't even eat in the cafeteria when chan and sana are there..." jisung softly said.

"i'm just worried, even his grades are dropping-" minho suddenly gets cut off with the sound of bags shuffling.

"don't worry, i already said i'm fine." felix said coldly as he made his way out the classroom.

——

days turned into weeks, and felix has been ignoring chan, he just couldn't take it anymore.

he was so damn tired of hoping and thought that ignoring chan would help.

but it didn't.

what hurt felix the most is that, chan didn't even notice.

he was so lost in his own world with sana, that he forgot about his friends.

and even felix, his own best friend.

——

felix really tried to brushing it off, like its not bothering him.

he didn't want to worry anyone and be a burden, so he kept that fake smile facade.

"lixie!!" his squirrel friend yelled.

"oh hi sung," felix replied, walking to his locker.

"uh you're not with chan- i mean- sorry..." jisung rambles.

"its okay," the freckled boy said, while stuffing books in his locker.

"by the way where's minho hyung?" jisung asked, wondering the whereabouts of his boyfriend.

"he's at dance prac- OH SHIT."

"LIX AREN'T YOU PART OF THE DANCE TEAM-"

"FUCK I'M LATE- GOTTA GO JI BYE!"

felix didn't really have dance practice today, he's only scheduled for monday's and thursday's.

he felt bad for lying to his friend, but he just wanted to be alone for now.

the blonde went to the convenience store he and chan always go to.

——

after paying for the things he bought, felix spotted two familiar people outside the store.

its chan and sana, eating tacos by the swing every.

'but i thought taco tuesday was our thing...' he thought.

it may be a small thing but it's a big deal for felix.

they both promised that the things they do will always be theirs, but chan seemed to already break that.

felix was hurt— no, is hurt.

but who is he to get jealous? who is he to get mad?

he's just chan's best friend and that's that.

nothing more, nothing less.

——

sorry for the late update :( i was quite busy but since school is finally done, i'll probably do a double update :D btw, thank you sm for 100+ reads, it means so much 😭 ily all ! <3

- h.