Stereo to Mono

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Hobi slowly pressed on the brakes and parked in front of the address Aiko sent. The house was at the end of a narrow road atop a hill. On the way, he calmed his nerves and tried to collect his thoughts. He didn't know exactly what he was going to say. He only knew how he felt. It couldn't be too late. Things had only just begun. He thought he had the time for things to burn slowly with Aiko, but it looked like he had to be a little more forward.

On the way, he decided what he was going to do. He would admit that he had read the book and see what she's going to say. He was going to lay his cards down and accept whatever she had to offer.

He stepped out of the SUV and walked to the gate to ring the bell. A few moments later, he heard footsteps and the squeak of the gate being opened. Aiko came into view and she had a worried expression on her face. She clutched her coat and wrapped it closely around her frame as she stepped out to join him on the street.

"What's that matter? Did something happen?" she asked him.

His practiced words disappeared. Hobi ran his fingers through his hair and shoved his hands in his coat pockets.

"Thank you for letting me see you tonight." He bowed to her.

Aiko looked up and down the empty street and looked up at him again. She opened the gate wider and let him in, but they only stood behind the gate. She looked at her feet uneasily as she waited for Hobi to speak.

"I'm... the thing is..." He stammered. "Is this a bad time?"

"Hoseok-ah." She said looking up, "Why did you come?"

Aish..Hobi thought. He started shifting from leg to leg until he took a deep breath and steeled himself. He inhaled sharply and finally said, "Forgive me, I'm going to fumble my words. The thing is I don't know how to begin. It's only because I have a lot of questions, and I really hope you can clear things up."

Aiko nodded, agreeing.

"The thing is, I haven't been quite honest... with you and me." Yes, Hobi thought to himself, let's start here. "I've realized that... I like being with you and I would like to see you again and again." He paused to see her reaction and got a little worried that she started to look uneasy.

"I mean, I'm not sure exactly if you feel the same way, and I'm sorry if this is taking you by surprise."

She still didn't say anything. It seemed like she was also thinking of what to say. Her eyebrows furrowed slightly, and Hobi's heart hammered in his chest. He had to settle things once and for all. He shouldn't falter. Don't chicken out, Hobi. He told himself. Now or never.

"Aiko, I've read your book. I've read H.O.P.E."

Aiko's eyes widened and her mouth dropped. Oh jeez, Hobi felt a slight panic rise in him. "I'm sorry! Oh, dear. Please don't be mad. I couldn't bring it up because I didn't know how you would react if you found out. I wasn't sure if... am I Hopi?" This is a disaster, his inner voice might as well had hands to throw up in the air. Hobi heard himself sighing out loud.

"Hoseok-ah... how?" she suddenly said, interrupting him. He pressed on when she didn't say anything to follow.

"That day at the bookstore, Jimin was paying for his advance copy." He mumbled. Hobi wanted to jog his brain for not being able to complete a thought. "I saw us in the book, was I wrong?"

He watched Aiko look down and blush uncomfortably.

He stepped forward which made her look back up. "Before I say what I came here to say, I need to know. Am I Hopi?"

She lost her voice as he regained his. He felt his chest swell as he braced for her next words. "Please Aiko..." he almost said in a whisper, "I need to know because I don't know exactly what I'm standing on right now."

Aiko stepped back and looked him in the eyes. "Hopi..." she said slowly, "is an idea of you... that I carried with me because I liked you."

Hobi blinked several times. He wasn't sure if he should be happy with her admission or feel sad because she said she liked him, in the past tense.

"Okay... okay." He said, processing what she was saying. "So, you'd written it before we met again, so it's not my fault you stopped liking me, right? Or is it my fault?" Before she could respond he held his hand up, asking for a minute to think some more. It was a whole lot and his process memory was getting overloaded. "Hm," he heard himself make a small audible sound. He tilted his head and reset. "I think... okay... I'll be quiet for now and if you could please just... explain."

"I was able to follow you. I was able to see you and the band get to where you are now."

"Why didn't you reach out to me?"

"Would you have heard me, in a sea of millions?"

Hobi didn't think about that, and he admitted to himself that he wasn't even looking.

"I wrote the book as my way of letting you go. I didn't even think we would ever meet again. It was time to move on."

"Well, we're standing in front of each other now. Doesn't that change things?"

Aiko regarded what he was saying, and she wanted to say yes. Fate had given them an opportunity to meet again, but she was afraid. "No." she finally said, sticking to her resolve.

Hobi felt like he was punched in the chest, and he instinctively clutched it. He looked down on the floor and took a breath as he let the impact settle.

"Was knowing the real me a disappointment?" He asked. He was afraid his voice was going to be shaky, but he was able to say it in one breath. He could have saved himself the hurt, but he was also determined that if he were to walk away, there would be no questions. He needed the facts. He needed to know there was no chance.

Oh, Hoseok-ah. Aiko's felt his pain sharply. "No. Definitely not. It's just that..." she began when the door of the house suddenly opened.

A man stood under the door frame looking at them. "Is there a problem here?" the man asked.

"No," Aiko replied to the man softly. "Please wait for me inside." Hesitantly, the man closed the door and left them alone.

Hobi felt his knees weaken. "Who's that? Is that your boyfriend?" He asked.

"Hoseok-ah... let's just be friends." Was the last thing Aiko said and he was unable to remember how he was able to take his leave and drive back home.

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