All Our Lives ✔

20|

Jim met us inside the hospital, after we'd said goodbye to Mrs. Anderson. With his arms around us, he walked us through everything the doctors and nurses had told him about what should and shouldn't be done once we were in the room.

Even though in my head all I could think was, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom...I let Sebri go in first and asked Jim to hang out with me in the hall for a minute.

"What is it, K? Is something wrong?" he asked, and I was sorry for causing him concern after everything he must've been through these last few days.

He would never know what had happened. Neither of them would.

Taking a deep breath, I said, "I love you, Dad." Phew. "I just wanted to call you that once."

I never had because I was afraid he would reject it—something I couldn't have handled. An irrational fear, knowing him as well as I did. But I also used to think he'd leave Mom the way a certain fool had. (It turned out fool genes got passed down.) After pretending not to care for so long, I wasn't sure when I'd let my guard down with him, but I didn't regret it; it was one of the best things I'd ever done. I only wished he'd met Mom earlier, before the other guy. That would've been nice.

"You wouldn't mind calling me that until and after I die, right?" he sniffed.

I wrapped my arms around him as tightly as I was able, and he returned the favor. In the middle of a hospital, my whole body aching, so near to those I loved...I could say I was home.

∞

The day Mom was finally discharged—promising me she would gnaw on my hair if she didn't get a real meal soon—we had an unexpected guest.

She was as skinny as I remembered her and had new streaks of gray in her hair. She held a sleepy Pomeranian under her arm and a bouquet between her teeth.

"Aunt Cathy, you're here!" I was in the process of nagging Mom to sit up and have some soup; she was lying on the couch with her back to me and acting petulant, reminding me of me (ugh).

I reached for the dog, Dipper, as Cathy freed her arms. Dipper came to curl up at my feet, and I patted her little head.

"My baby was hurt, so naturally I came to give her a hard time." Cathy framed her hands over Mom's butt, which was currently pointed in her direction. "It's gotten bigger, let me take a picture..."

"Shut up and kiss my daughter," Mom said over her shoulder, waving her off.

The gleeful woman winked at me, mischief in her eyes. "I still do everything she says."

My jaw dropped. What the hell had happened to my sweet Aunt Cathy?

"AHHHHH, SO IT WAS TRUE!"

Mom was going to make a full recovery, and that Christmas...

Sebri straightened the tinsel halo wiggling on my head—whispering, "All that's left is to put you on top of the tree..."—and Jim took that moment to use his new camera.

My girlfriend was wearing a giant red sweater as a dress, and it suited her. Meanwhile I pounced on the moment as we were briefly left alone and lifted my green skirt to show her the straps of my garter belt.

Sebri broke the heads off our gingerbread men (I would gladly pay for my teasing later) while I opened my last presents, one of which was a hundred-dollar gift card to my favorite lingerie store. She'd gotten a job and was using her money wisely.

"Bath bombs!" I ran around with them in my arms, then set them aside and leaped on her. God, it was good to hear her laugh.

"Why does this small stuff make you so happy? I want to buy you a house."