All Our Lives ✔

EPILOGUE, PART I

She was at the counter, on her phone—in better shape than I'd ever seen her, skin glowing. Even the buzz cut suited her (over the years, she'd grow it as long as it was before and buzz it off again, rinse and repeat).

I visited Sebri at the tattoo shop—where she'd earned an apprenticeship—often. Oscar and I were even becoming friends: now when I talked to him, he actually grunted back.

"Beautiful," I said, placing the bag before her, "I brought lunch. I don't know if it's okay to order you something by delivery?"

She looked up and smiled. "It's fine, Angel."

I paused to adjust my ankle strap. Sebri leaned to the side to observe.

"Do that again, it's good for business."

I only liked to bend over in private, which she damn well knew. "Fuck off."

Looking around to make sure her boss wasn't nearby, I gave her a hurried peck. Let him see it on the cameras later when he couldn't do anything about it.

"Bye, honeys," I said, talking directly to her cleavage and holding my hand in front of her face when she made a sound of amusement. "Excuse me, I'm talking to my best friends."

"My line. Angels shouldn't steal."

"Angels shouldn't do what I did to you last night either, but here we are..." I stuck my tongue out as I fixed my top button for the fifth or sixth time. The perils of having hot-air balloons to cover up.

Sebri bit her lip (probably so she wouldn't get fired for being naughty), just watching me. If she was enjoying this, I'd give her a real show later.

At that moment, Oscar, coming out of the bathroom and chewing on gum...swallowed it.

I waved and fled so I wouldn't have to hear his hacking coughs.

Next I went to Sean's grave, bringing flowers along. From me and from Sebri. I never spoke when I was there; I just let time pass. One day we'd drop a bouquet at the cave, deep in which two skeletons had never been found.

We had dinner with Jim and Mom. Lucy brought her equally miniature (freshman) boyfriend, plus Mr. and Mrs. Anderson stopped by. Diane, although invited, was a no-show, as expected. Someday she would be even older, totally alone with the realization that the mountain of doom she'd seen was a mirage. But I didn't concern myself with that.

Whenever there was some sort of disaster on the news, I'd use it as an excuse to check in with Elba—and assure her that we weren't responsible. "It wasn't us!" "You haven't called the feds, have you?" "I swear I have an alibi!" The joke got old for her pretty much instantly. Still, she always picked up. (I assumed she'd answer, put the phone down, and let me ramble into the air so my words would evaporate rather than touch her.)

We even heard from Colin sometimes, as we'd agreed to keep in touch. 

We'd rented a new apartment together and spent a lot of our free days being loving hermits. One night, Sebri asked me to meet her at home, and there was a piece of paper taped to the door. From a distance, I saw it and thought we were getting evicted or something.

Then I got there and started reading. There were actually two pages.

The first was faded in color; she must've written it a while ago:

And the second...

I turned it over—

—and gasped, pushing the door—already ajar—open. The average-sized space was crowded with balloons, lights, flowers...and Sebri kneeled in the middle.

I closed the door, trembling.

"So, Angel," she said, "maybe a tiny part of me does believe, a tiny splinter somewhere deep, and I wouldn't have known if you hadn't joined me in this life, because that's the word, the thought, and the image that came to my mind, my lips, the tip of my tongue, the second I saw you...Kera Orsin."

I went to her and fell to my knees.

"You were sent from a better place. And you made this one a little less dark. It gets brighter every day, because of you. Will you marry me?" she asked.

Crying, I gave her my answer. "A million times, a million ways, a million lifetimes...yes."

She placed the ring on my finger, and my heart swelled not at the gorgeous pink stone, but at the weight of my promise.

Taking in everything she'd done, I saw that my favorites from her art that I'd had blown up to decorate the walls were now joined by her favorite pieces of me—my eyes, throat, hands,  chest...we were running out of room.

"I was thinking of a good way to do it, but you beat me to everything!" I laughed.

She kissed me softly and then hard as I straddled her, forcing her onto her back.

"And here I was working on my wedding vows, carrying them around in my purse..." I said dreamily, my arms out on either side of me. "I'll have to rewrite everything. That was so beautiful..."

Busy tugging on my skirt, which had no zipper and was tight enough to cut off circulation, Sebri went still at this.

I stood up and threw off my equally tight top, enjoying the way her gaze burned on me.

No matter the season, it was always summer for us.

Her head turned to watch my path to our bedroom. Normally she'd catch up with me before my back was even turned and stop me in my tracks.

But I waited in bed...and waited. I ended up throwing my robe on and going to see what was holding her up.

She stood motionless with a small piece of paper in her hand. Tears were rolling down her face.

"I'm not a writer," I said nervously. "It wasn't any good...but I'll get it right..."

I'd written from my big goofy heart.

I want you, your perfection and your flaws, the worlds you draw from nothing, the heartache in your soul—predictable, exciting, big and small...I want it all, forever...all of you.

She put the paper down gently and came to me, leaving her tears where they were.

We did make it to the bed...after a while.

As we embarked on our new beginning, we were still occasionally forced to confront the fact that for our previous selves, when it had ended, it had ended badly—often in death, always in misery.

"So let's not let it end," Sebri said—the exact words on my mind. 

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A/N: !!This is Part One of the 2-Part epilogue.!!