The perfect woman - My best friend's mom (GirlxGirl)

Twelve - Moment of truth

A soft knock on the door.

I had been peaking out the upstairs window in my bedroom while I was getting ready to see if her car would pull up in front of the house. I hadn't seen nor heard any car which made the knock on the front door a surprise. I walked downstairs and checked my appearance one last time in the hallway mirror. I had put on black skinny jeans, a light purple flowy tank top tucked into the jeans at the front, and wore my hair down. I had even put on some makeup, mostly to hide the tiredness I felt from my cold. I walked the last steps towards the door and opened it, revealing a smiling April with a paper bag in one hand and her handbag over her other shoulder.

"Hey, come in," I said and stepped to the side to let her inside.

"Hey," she replied and followed my invitation.

I closed the door behind her and walked past her, leaving her room to take off her outdoor clothes. Underneath the winter jacket she wore light blue skinny jeans and a black long-sleeved V-necked top. Her hair was loosely curled and the front pieces pinned back. A silver necklace glimmered in the open space above the shirt with a small heart hanging from the chain.  A matching pair of heart earrings dangled from her ears. As she bent down to pick up the paper bag she had put down on the floor, her sleeve was pulled up slightly to reveal a bracelet with the same heart charms on her wrist.

She stood up and looked at me staring at her. I quickly looked away and led the way into the kitchen. My dad's house was smaller than the Baker's. Both were two-story houses with a kitchen, living room and guest bedroom on the main floor and bedrooms on the upper floor, but the Baker's house had four bedrooms upstairs, while dad's house only had two bedrooms upstairs. Our kitchen was also considerably smaller than the Baker's, who's kitchen had room for a big 14 seat dining room table as well as a standard sized dinner table. But the house my dad and I lived in was cozy and good-sized for the two of us.

"Your kitchen is lovely," April said as she put down the paper bag on the island and looked around as if it was the first time she had been here.

"Thank you," I said, "but you've surely been here before, haven't you?"

"Actually, I can't remember that I have," she answered.

My mom and dad were good friends with April and Henry, mostly because their daughters were best friends. They often had dinner together when Jas and I were little, but things got more complicated after the divorce. We sold the house I grew up in and dad moved into this house. Mom moved into an apartment in Peak at first to be close to me, but as I grew older and she got a new job, she moved to Charmon. My parents' relationship had been strained ever since the divorce which also affected their friendship with Jasmine's parents. Mom could have dinner with them, or dad could, but never both of them together. And if my dad had ever gotten together with April and Henry for dinner, they probably chose the bigger house for the occasion.

"Are you hungry?" April asked and pulled out two boxes from the paper bag.

"Starving," I answered.

The boxes contained two identical meals of fried tofu and vegetables, rice and a white sauce drizzled on top. The food was still warm and the smell of it filled the room.

"Did you make this?" I asked in awe.

"Yes," she answered and smiled. "I hope you'll like it."

"I'm sure I will, it looks delicious."

I pulled out some cutlery and two glasses and handed them to April. Her fingers grazed mine ever so slightly and an electric pulse went through my body. She quickly retracted her hand and looked away. I was hurt by this behaviour and distracted myself from my spinning thoughts by filling up a jug with water. Returning with the water to the island, I sat down beside April who had already taken her seat. We started to eat our food, which was indeed delicious, and the tension in the room built for every bite. After a long while, April took a deep breath and cleared her throat.

"So," she began, looking at me and then looking down at her food. "I wanted to talk to you."

I sat still, listening anxiously.

"I've been thinking, about the other night, and," she took another deep breath and looked directly at me, "I would like it if we could just forget about that and pretend that nothing happened." 

The disappointment was great and immediate. Her words cut through me like a sharp knife and I felt myself getting numb. The perfect woman, my perfect woman, had just rejected me. She kissed me, and now she wants to just pretend that nothing happened. I felt anger building inside me, anger at her, at our situation and at myself. Should I fight for her? Should I agree and let it go? Let her go. I looked at her, taking in her features, her expression and her emotions. Is this what she wanted?

"Is this what you want?" I repeated my thought out loud.

A moment of silence.

"Yes," she said.

Failing to stop my impulse, I reached out and put my hand over hers. She froze under my touch and stared at our hands. I held still. I wanted to know if she felt the same connection as I did whenever we touched. 

"Liv, please," she said in an almost whisper and slowly withdrew her hand. 

I pulled back my hand as well, taking the fork and sat still, sad, angry, heartbroken. But if this was what she wanted, I had to respect that. I nodded slightly and gave her a forced smile, ensuring her that I had received her message. We went back to silently eating and April left shortly thereafter. When the door closed behind her, I slid down the wall to the floor, pulled my knees up to my chest and let my emotions flood out through my eyes.