The perfect woman - My best friend's mom (GirlxGirl)

Fifteen - New normal

***TW: Potential eating disorder triggers***

After last night's events, I figured that it'd be best to keep some distance to April for a while. It would be fairly easy if I just avoided to go to her house. The problem with that was that my best friend also lived in that house. I considered for a moment to give up on our friendship and just ghost Jasmine; it would be the easiest way. But I quickly told myself that no, I couldn't do that. Jasmine hadn't done anything wrong so I shouldn't punish her. I loved to have her as my best friend. But what would I do then? I could try to get her to meet at my dad's house instead of at the Baker's. It would work for a while but she would probably start to ask questions, soon, and to those, I didn't have answers. Or, I didn't have answers that I could share with Jasmine. Telling her the truth was off limits, now and forever. But moving our hang outs would buy me some time to figure out a long term solution, and it was the only way I could think of that would allow me to keep my friend while trying to avoid her mother. It had to work. It just had to.

"You seem awfully quiet this morning," Jasmine commented on our way to our first class of the day, math.

"I'm just tired," I replied.

"Are you feeling better than yesterday?"

"Yes, I think I might've just eaten something bad," I lied.

"Oh, good. Or, not good that you ate something bad but good that you're feeling better." Jasmine chuckled.

"Yeah," I nodded. In reality, I didn't feel particularly better, except that I had stopped crying. Images of April still occupied my mind the majority of the time, and my heart ached. I tried to put on a smile and act like nothing was up.

I had gotten pretty good at hiding my emotions over the years. One might think that because my mom was a therapist, she would be a great mom, but that wasn't really the case. She had worked long hours and was away from home a lot when I grew up. After the divorce, I saw even less of her. When she was home, she was very tired and, though she never said it directly, she made it feel like she didn't have the energy to deal with me and my emotions after seeing clients all day. My dad was good, he was home more than mom, but we didn't talk very much about emotions. He would often tell me to talk to mom about those kinds of things, since she was more "educated" about it, as he put it, but he didn't know how nearly impossible that was. So I stopped talking to them both about how I felt, and they didn't ask. I had talked to Jasmine sometimes, but mostly I had just kept it to myself. Maybe that's why it took me so long to come out to anyone. Until April. With her, I feel seen, heard, safe. She had this aura around her, a welcoming spirit that made it feel like it was okay to talk. Though I was scared to, it had felt like I could talk to her. Now, the image of April made my stomach turn around, literally, and I found myself rushing to the nearest bathroom.

"Hey, you'll be late for class," Jasmine yelled after me, but my stomach had other plans than to learn math. I made it to the toilet just in time and threw up my breakfast. Maybe I had eaten something bad, I chuckled in my head. When my stomach had calmed down, I slumped down on the floor with my back against the wall. I felt slightly dizzy but I was overall okay. The burning pain I had felt all morning had shrunk significantly and had been replaced by an uncomfortable burn in my throat. I reached for the water bottle in my bag, when I caught sight of my wristwatch and saw that I was already 10 minutes late to math. I chugged down half the bottle and then quickly stood up, straightened out my clothes and washed my hands.

I hurried the short distance to the lecture hall and stopped outside for a second to catch my breath. I slowly opened the door, climbed the stairs as silently as I could, and slumped down next to Jasmine. I was sure that everyone had seen me, but I knew that I wasn't the first one to come in late for a lecture, so I tried to not be too bothered.

"Hey, you okay?" Jasmine whispered under her breath.

"Yeah," I said and pulled out my notebook and pencil. Jasmine looked at me for a second like she wanted to say something, but retreated and turned her attention back to the professor.

* * *

"Hey, wait up!" A man's voice came from down the hallway as Jasmine and I walked out of the lecture hall. 

"Marcus!" Jasmine squealed excited and met him halfway. The man who I had only seen in pictures, picked her up, spun her around and gave her a kiss. "I want you to meet Liv!" Jasmine said when her feet reunited with the floor.

"Hi," I said in a hesitant voice. Jasmine and Marcus returned to me and Marcus shook my hand.

"It's nice to finally meet you, I've heard so much about you," Marcus said. Only good things I hope, I thought in my head as a line taken from a movie, but I stopped myself from saying it out loud. "I was thinking," Marcus said and turned to Jasmine, "maybe we should hang out, all three of us? I could bring some of my friends too, if you want?"

"Oh, that would be awesome!" Jasmine beemed. "What do you say, Liv?" I thought about it for a minute, and quickly came to the realization that if Marcus invited us, we would probably not be at Jasmine's house, and that was what I was trying to acchieve.

"I'm in," I said. 

"Nice!" Marcus said. "Are you available tonight? We can meet at my apartment at five and order pizza or something, if that works for you?"

"That's great," Jasmine and I said simultaneously.

"I have class now but I'll see you later," he said, kissed Jasmine again and then left.

"Isn't he great!" Jasmine had a big smile on her face for the rest of the day.

* * *

At 4.30pm, we closed our notebooks, packed up our things and left the library which we had been studying at for the past two hours. We walked to the closest bus stop and waited two minutes until a red bus appeared around the corner, with the text "6 Westfall" written across the top in digital letters.

"That's the one," Jasmine said. We got on the bus and took the seats at the very back; I got the window seat. Jasmine had been to Marcus apartment  before, so when we got off, she led the way to a beige, four story building. In through the door 43, up two stairs and to the right.

"Hey!" Marcus said excitedly and embraced his girlfriend as he let us in. We stepped into a small entrance with coats hanging to the left and a door to the right. "Bathroom," Marcus said and motioned towards the door. The entrance led into a corridor with two doors to the left and a kitchen to the right. Two people were sitting at the kitchen table, "Max and Lucas," Marcus said as we walked by. At the end of the corridor to the right was the living room with a big couch placed at the wall furthest away, facing a TV hung on the kitchen wall. Big windows revealed a balcony outside and the street below. Another two people sat in the sofa, playing video games.

"Hey, this is Jasmine and Liv," Marcus said to them. "This is Sebastian, my roommate, and his sister Rebecca."

"Hiya," Sebastian said before turning his attention back to the game.

"Hey, nice to meet you," Rebecca said, shooting an irritated look at her brother for not paying more attention to their guests, and rising from the couch. She was tall, with a lean body and long brown hair. Her steps were confident and her handshake was assertive. Her brown eyes were soft and curious and her lips were formed in a warm smile.

"So, now that we've all met, what do y'all say about pizza?" Marcus asked.