// Best YA Romance in the Romance Fiction Awards 2021//
Thrill Hawthorne, keeping up to his name, lives his life on the edge. Or so people think.
Ignatius Rookwood is the darling son and the sole male heir to a gigantic business corporation. Or so...
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Ignatius knew it was his fault, all of it.
His mother might have been the mastermind behind this mess, but he was the one who started it. If he hadn't told his mother about Thrill licking him that night, none of this would've happened. He wouldn't be homeless and penniless, and Thrill... Thrill's life would not have been destroyed.
Watching the brave, brave boy get ready to hand himself to the police, Ignatius wanted to cry. He wanted to hold on to Thrill, and cry till he couldn't breathe anymore. But he didn't, of course, because it was going to do no good. It would only make things more difficult.
So Ignatius just stood there, frozen, numb, as if waiting to wake up from this nightmare.
"It'll be fine, no need to stress," Thrill said, maybe to himself, maybe to Ignatius, who knew? He was staring down at hands, fisting and unfisting them. "Been there, done that, a lot of times." He let out a heavy sigh that echoed through the empty living room, well empty except for him, Ignatius and Seraphina awkwardly standing there, unsure of what to say or do. Caspian and his mother were outside, dealing with the horde of policemen and news reporters.
"Iggy," Thrill whispered, finally looking up. He caught Ignatius' eyes and offered him a small smile, "it's not your fault."
All of a sudden, Ignatius wished he could trade places with Thrill. His life was already over, he wouldn't mind taking Thrill's place. It, after all, was his fault; he was the one who used homophobic slurs, who made up lies and spewed insults. It was him who ruined Thrill's life...
Thrill kept looking at Ignatius as if seeking an answer but what was Ignatius supposed to say? He stared back – drinking in the sight of Thrill, how that bold, cheerful boy was reduced to this scared, wrecked person – and said nothing.
When Thrill received no response from Ignatius, his lips twitched into a painful smile. "Look after him, will you, Seraphina? He's quite prone to dying."
Ignatius knew Thrill wanted him to do something, at least, say something – he could see it in Thrill's eyes – but it was like Ignatius' brain had shut down, leaving him dazed and numb and incapable of coming up with a response.
It was his fault.
It was his fault.
It was his fault.
What could he possibly do, or say, to make up for it, let alone fix it.
After what could've been seconds or minutes or hours, Thrill finally turned around and walked out of the house. Without a goodbye.
"Ignatius!" Seraphina hissed.
Ignatius turned to her, slowly.
"What're you doing?"
He did not understand her question.
Seraphina stepped closer and lightly slapped him on both the cheeks. "Snap out of it."
