chapter 12

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amelia's POV

i am going into work by myself today because madison didn't want to come, but i am quite worried. the last time that i left the house and went to work without madison, she ended up getting high and i don't want that to happen again. even though she has given me her drugs and i got rid of them, i am still worried that she is going to find something to take or she never gave me all of them and will still find a way to get high. if she does somehow get out the house, i will blame myself for not locking the door or somehow preventing her from getting out the house and getting high.

i don't have to be in until 12:00pm today so i get to spend a little bit of time with madison before i leave. while watching netflix, i feel the sofa move. i look to my left and see madison has sat down next to me.

"good morning" i say

"good morning did you sleep well?" she says

"yes i did actually you?"

"yeah i slept pretty good. are you excited to go to work without me again? no child to worry about running around the hospital" she giggles

"you're not really a child that runs around the hospital but i'm gonna miss you a lot, i quite like taking you to the hospital i won't lie."

after a couple hours of just chilling, i realise i need to leave

"madison, i need to go. have a good day!" i say as i shut the door.

when i get to the hospital i check my phone and see madison has texted me:

madison: have a great day at work! i love you, don't miss me too much :)

amelia: i love you more <3

madison's POV

amelia had left and i was home alone again for the first time in a while. amelia had been taking me to the hospital but i was getting a little bored of sitting in the attendings lounge all day so i opted to stay at home today. i know that amelia was going to worry all day about me being at home, because the last time she was at work without me, i did drugs. she cares so much about me and it is the first time i have ever actually felt loved.

after what felt like days of being home alone, i text josh and as if to come over. i tell him not to bring any drugs with him because i am trying to get sober and so i need to stay off them. i have no way of leaving the house, but i knew a way that josh could get in.

five minutes later josh had climbed over the garden fence and was in amelia's garden with me. i am not sure what amelia would think of this situation, but as long josh leaves before she gets home, no one will know.

"hey madi!" he says as i walk up to him

"hey josh, how have you been?"

"good thanks, i brought some pills just in case you decided you did want to do drugs." he pulls a bag of pills out of his backpack.

"don't tempt me, i can't" i shove the drugs back at him "take them back"

"no, keep them, for emergencies. if you don't want them now just take them inside for later." he tries to persuade me. "they're free" he smiles.

"josh i don't want them" he stares at me and will not let me give them back. "fine then i will keep them" i guess i will just have to find a way to get rid of them before amelia comes home. suddenly, josh pulls a picnic blanket out of his bag and a load of food.

"josh, what is all of this?" i say shocked and surprised

"well, what do you want it to be?"

"are you implying that this is a date?"

"if you want it to be" he smirks at me. he definitely had the intentions for this to be a date. i have always kind of liked josh, it has never been like a proper crush, but this just brought out my attraction to him more. he was a genuinely sweet guy sometimes.

we just talk casually about life and what living with amelia is like. he is being so cute and keeps feeding me food. i can not stop smiling. i honestly feel like i can talk to him about anything. he has known me my whole life and everything i have been through, he just understands. he has been my best friend for years and i don't know what starting a relationship could do. if we break up, it could completely ruin the amazing friendship that we already have.

we finish eating and lay on the grass, looking at the shapes the clouds make.

"come here" he says with his arms wide open. i crawl up to him and lay my head on his chest. josh is such a romantic, and i love it.

"you're really sweet you know?" i say

"i can be when i want to be"

suddenly, i hear the front door being unlocked.

"josh, you have to go. i will call you later or something, just tidy up and get over the fence. i am going to distract amelia.

amelia's POV

as soon as i open the door, madison is running up to greet me.

"hey amelia, how was your day at work?" she asks

"it was good, i missed you though"

"i missed you too. did you do any cool surgeries? did you see dr webber, or meredith, or maggie? anyone do anything interesting? anyone die?"

"why on earth are you asking so many questions?" madison is making me worried. i feel like she is trying to distract me from something. i begin to walk further into the house to try and see what she had done. as we walk into the kitchen, i see the garden door wide open.

"have you been outside?" i ask

"yeah i sat on the bench earlier because i was bored of being inside" she says. sounds normal to me. when i look outside however, i see something on the floor. i walk out and pick it up. it was a bag of pills.

"MADISON" i shout waiting for her to come outside. tears begin to form in my eyes. i knew i shouldn't have left her alone. i knew she was going to do drugs again. she was doing so well at getting sober, almost at 2 weeks, and now she had thrown that away just because i wasn't here. it was all my fault. i turn around and look at the ground. i don't even want to see her right now. i am disappointed, but i know that relapse is a part of recovery. i have to be supportive no matter what.

"what?" i hear madison ask. i turn around and she can probably see the tears in my eyes. "omg amelia, i can explain."

"please do" i say angry and upset, hoping she will tell me the truth and not try to make up an excuse.

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