Arranged Marriage With A Game Developer

Chapter 27

Nati's P.O.V.

Days pass into weeks and weeks into a month. After my conversation with Dream in the park, he never attempted to talk to me again. That's the last time that we've seen each other. After he broke our engagement, my initial plan is to go back to Solstice and continue my life like my original plan. However, for some reason, there is a part of me who doesn't want to leave Haerai.

I once thought that if the wedding gets canceled, I'll be happy. I value my freedom so much and I don't want to marry Dream. However, feeling my chest aches in emptiness and longing right now makes me question what the hell is wrong with me. I should be happy. I'm free again. But, there's a void inside my heart, an empty space waiting to be filled. I run my fingers through my thick hair as I lean on the tub, enjoying the warm water that envelopes my body. I pull my knees towards my chest and hug it.

I hate this feeling of emptiness in my chest, this hollow feeling. It makes me feel incomplete as if there's somethings missing. I don't understand myself anymore. What is wrong with me?

Realizing that I won't be able to get an answer from those questions that swarming inside my head by staring at the water, I decided to stand up. Kinuha ko ang towel sa rack na kalapit lang ng bathtub at saka binalot ang hubad kong katawan.

Just when I am about to walk out of the bathroom when I feel like the room starts to twirl around me. Kumunot ang noo ko at saka napahinto ako sa paghakbang ng mapansin ang unti-unting pagdilim ng paningin ko. My hand clutches my chest as I blink twice, trying to get rid of the black dots that suddenly swarmed my vision.

'Fuck it!' I hissed inside my head. What the heck is wrong with me now? I stayed still for a few minutes to calm my heart beat. Napahingal ako nang sa wakas ay maglaho na ang kakaibang pakiramdam na bumalot sa akin. What was that?

Ipinilig ko ang ulo ko at saka tuluyan nang lumabas ng banyo. Tinungo ko ang closet ko at saka doon nagbihis. Astrid and I decided to take time off today. We are going planning to have a roadtrip and probably go to nearby town for a short sightseeing. Being stuck inside my room after Dream break the engagement is not doing me good. I need to get out to take off my mind from my current situation. Maybe that way I'll feel so much better and I can think much clearer.

Pagkatapos magbihis ay nagpasya akong magapply ng kaunting make-up. I can't help but notice the blank look in my eyes as I stare myself in front of the mirror. My skin looks dull, so is my eyes. The glow that used to be in it is now gone. I look so much paler now than before. I wonder if it has something to do with the storm inside my chest.

After applying a light make-up to hide my dreary appearance, I pick up the hair blower so that I can start styling my hair, that is when the door of my room burst open. Astrid entered my room with a worried look on her face. Tinaasan ko ito ng kilay.

"Yes?" I inquired, slightly concerned of what could be the reason behind her worrisome expression.

"Have you watched the news?" Agad nitong tanong dahilan upang lalo akong magtaka.

"No, why?"

Astrid didn't answer. Instead, she walk towards the television of my room and turn it on. She put it on a news channel. Kumunot ang noo ko sa iginawi nito. That is the news caption sinks in to me. 'A gaming magnate seen on a romantic date with a celebrity chef.' Pakiramdam ay parang may sumuntok sa dibdib ko habang nakatingin kay Dream na kaholding hands ang babae. The side of my eyes starts to water as my hand ball into a fist. The pain and defeat in my chest is inevitable.

'I love you, Nati. But I don't want to force you into something that I know will only both hurt us in the end. I'm calling the wedding off. I'm giving you your freedom back.'

Love my ass. That man is a joke. I feel a lone tear slide from the side of my left eyes to my cheek. Inis na pinahid ko iyon. I don't love him, I shouldn't feel this way. I know first hand how shitful he is, how great he is in pretending. I shouldn't believe a single word he said.

I take the remote control from the bed side table and turn the TV off. He already broke our engagement, there's no wedding that's happening. Why am I still affected by his actions anyway? So what if date someone else? It is none of my business.

"Are you okay?" Dama ko ang pag-aalala sa tinig ni Astrid.

Napilitan akong tumango rito.

"I am, I just need to get out of this house. I'll schedule my flight back to Solstice by next week." Huminga ako ng malalim upang pigilan ang sarili kong mapaiyak. The urge to cry my eyes out right now is so hard to ignore. But I refuse to allow my emotion to overpower me. Our relationship over, I shouldn't be affected by the News

Astrid looks at me with understanding and sad smile on her lips.

"Let's go." Wika ko saka dinampot ang shoulder bag ko mula sa kama at saka nagpatiunang lumabas ng kwarto.

Sumunod sa akin si Astrid at ilang saglit pa ay nasa loob na kami ng sasakyan ko. The pain in my chest seems constant. The image of Dream smiling sweetly at the woman makes it hard for me to breath. Napahawak ako sa dibdib ko. I thought I don't love him anymore, then why does it feel so painful? Why does it still affect me?

"If you want we can stay here instead and drink our brains out." Wika ni Astrid dahilan upang mapatingin ako rito.

Saka ko lang narealize na hindi ko pa pala natuturn-on ang ignition ng sasakyan. Bagkus ay nakatitig lamang ako sa manibela. Wala sa loob na napailing ako sa sinabi nito.

"I– I don't think staying here is a good idea. I need to get out to appease my mind." Paliwanag ko rito. Sinalubong ko ang mga mata nito. I'm trying my best not to break down right now. "I'm sorry, can you drive instead? I don't think I am in the right condition to drive right now."

Astrid nodded in understanding. Bumaba ito mula sa passenger seat at saka umikot patungo sa pwesto ko. I open the door in my side as well to exchange seat with her.

"Where to?" Tanong nito sa akin matapos umayos ng pagkakaupo.

"I don't know. Anywhere will do." Wala sa loob na sagot ko rito.

Napailing na lang si Astrid habang nakatitig sa akin. She turns on the car and play a sweet song from the radio before start driving. Nanatili akong nakatitig sa labas ng bintana ng sasakyan. I don't understand myself anymore. This whole ordeal is making me feel sick and confuse with my own emotion. I'm starting to hate myself. Why can't I simply stop being affected with his actions? After all it is none of my business anymore.

Ilang sandali pa ay inihinto ni Astrid sa tapat ng isang kilalang resort. It's a resort that offers camping and it's in front of the lake, that's why it is a very famous destination for tourist and to those locals who wants to unwind. Kunot-noong tumingin ako rito.

"Why here?" Taas-kilay kong tanong sa kanya.

Astrid looks at me with a sweet smile on her lips. She shrug her shoulder before turning her eyes on the aesthetically pleasing view of the resort in front of us.

"You said anywhere will do. I kinda saw this resort on the way to your house before and since we are leaving next week. I think this is the best time I can visit this place." Kumislap ang mga mata nito sa excitement. "We can camp out here, you can drown in alcohol while talking shit about your ex-fiance. We can have a small talk under the sky and swim in the lake afterwards. That seems promising, right?"

Napangiti na lang ako sa sinabi niya. Yup, she's right. That seems promising. Camping out with nature and staring at the clear sky during the night sounds like a great way to clear my head.

"Yeah, that sounds great. Let's go." Nakangiting wika ko rito saka nagpatiunang bumaba ng sasakyan.

I guess this is going to be a good distraction while I am trying to console myself. It's so much better than keep on having some destructive thoughts inside my room. Perhaps, after this night I can finally let go of the pain and move on freely with my life.