sorry i killed your girlfriend | iwaoi

3- at wits end

the clock struck three. three fucking am. i have three hours until i need to leave this house, and i'm sure I won't get a wink of fucking sleep. i mean, don't judge me, get back to me when theres a corpse on your brand new carpet. see if you could sleep them. but that is besides the point. this has to be my one thousandth draft, and i'm only on the second paragraph.

its incredibly sad since writing is the only thing i'm good at in class. i just keep zoning out or crying, not much work is being produced. and i'm two hours into this? the littlest of things is setting me off, chris snoring, the outdoors cat scratching on the door. EVERYTHING. i even got distracted by the own sound of my tears. what the actual fuck.

and I don't even have adhd! oikawa does! i knew it, he's the source of my problems. I wouldn't be here if I didn't kill his girlfriend, and i mean they are dating so this is obviously all his fault. is what i was wishing I'd believe, but since half of my body is bright red, i'm having a hard time deciding so.

i look down at the piece of paper on my floor, my god the hell this letter has put me through is unmatchable. i wish i had just sent a text, but its kind of like breaking up over text, sad and fucking rude. especially since its double homicide, break up plus murder.

out of anger, i threw my pen, i was so done with this. i just wanted it to be over, even though i knew it was my fault. and it wouldn't of happened if emery wasn't a fucking slut. "now, i guess its time i should share how we got here, oiks." i write onto my paper.

it had all started when i was invited to a party, oikawa didn't show because he was grounded. but everybody else showed, including his girlfriend. it was going smoothly, drinks were being handed out, i was taking shots like no tomorrow. i've learned something, vodka is the only good alcohol to take before murdering a girl.

before i knew it, emery was chatting me up like i was a cheap hooker. she literally tried to get into my pants. so i let her, i got this idea in my mind i would like thrust into her eye or something and permanently blind her, but I definitely got the idea of murder...

as she was screaming out my name, i stabbed her. I didn't like any minute of it, it was kind of deafening. and for some reason, she didn't wake up chris. weird huh! but for some reason she was brunette. I coulda sworn she was blonde before!

i took the piss here, i let her do her thing to take advantage of revenge. "that's what happened oikawa, I can't tell you enough of how i'm sorry. i know you really loved her, even if she dressed like a three year old stripper." i wrote, i know i did it out of jealousy, and the fear of losing my best friend who i also have a crush on.

"okay, new concept, that was depressing. i love you. i did it because i want to be yours, not be your best friend and watch her be yours." i nodded in approval. "and i'm much better, i have style and i'm not gross!" i added, before profusely apologizing to emery, the dead person in this predicament.

"i really do feel bad, i know how much you love her, i just couldn't hold my anger in. I didn't understand the concept of love until you helped teach me it, and I couldn't be more grateful for you, oikawa. you're the reason i hold on." its hard to think that this could be the last thing I'm giving him..

"i just want you to know, you will always be the most important person in my life. no matter where we end up, separated or together. i will never forget you, no matter how hard i try, my memories of you never die." were the last words of the letter. this letter would make or break the rest of my life.

i would hope he would turn me in, tell the police i'm a malicious monster, it wouldn't take long for them to be able to trial me as an adult. so maybe i'll get twenty five years, or like life. now. my next decision. what to do with the corpse...

she's just kinda down there. i mean, i'm sure she's having a good time?? good for her, she probably went to heaven. the plan. i should really think about it. do i give him the letter and dramatically shoot myself??

give it to him as an early birthday present and call the police on myself? or should i just keep this as my suicide note, very hard decision. i'd always wanted to be some sort of president, and in a way this reminds me of being in a boardroom deciding my next move to world destruction or something.

i get up and scramble through my certainly messy desk, and found a stack of envelopes, i might as well present the "condolences, i killed your girlfriend!" card in a nice way, go out with a bang. i turn on my favorite playlist.

i plugged in my headphones, the first song being are you satisfied by marina, it adds flavor to this situation. i folded up the paper so it could fit properly, all neat and stuff. i tucked it into the envelope, and licked it shut.

I proceeded to add an alien sticker to the point part, to hold it down better. and on the backside, in my best cursive i wrote "to my dearest oikawa. from iwa." fitting, it sounds like some old time-y note from the duke to some duchess. I'd obviously be the duke, oikawa's a twink.

its time to make my big decision.