Paganini's Puppet | Ryeji

Letter

Yeji POV
To my dearest,

I have the urge to declare my sanity and justify my actions, but I assume I'll never be able to convince anyone that this was the right decision. By the time you read this, I'll be nothing more than a fleeting memory that invades your mind - a passive thought you reminisce back on years from now. Memories we experienced, all of which I am eternally grateful for. Grateful to you. Some moments of pure bliss filled with laughter that echoed throughout the night as time flew from our grasps. Others of darkness that seemed to go on endlessly, turning mere seconds into timeless fragments. But it's becoming too much for me now. Those nights full of despair became days, then months, and slowly years. The same despair that served as a reminder that I was alive now taunts me with life. It sounds like I'm being ungrateful. Just a whiny bitch complaining about something so minute compared to all the other problems of the world. I guess I am. How can my sadness stack up against the harsh realities of life elsewhere-where people are being slaughtered ad infinitum, dying of disease and famine. No homes. No families. I have no right to complain. I guess I'm not as strong as you are. It's said only the strongest, most adaptable survive. So it's only fitting that you live to carry on this legacy. I hope one day you can forgive me for being such a burden. For running away from all the mistakes I've made, the problems I've created - leaving you to take care of them. It's very selfish of me. But I know you'll be able to handle it. Strong enough to shoulder the weight of the world and keep moving forward. Live a fulfilling life for the both of us. Chase your dreams and become a world class pianist. Goodbye, Lia.

-HYJ

I silently cried under the sheets of my bed as I read the tear-stained letter written exactly a year ago. I was too much of a coward to go through with it.
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"Hey, you look a little out of it. How much sleep did you get?" Lia asked worriedly.

"I don't know. Four hours?"

"Honey. You need to sleep a lot more than that. Why aren't you going to bed earlier??"

"I just needed time to think..."

"Think about what?"

"Hey Yeji!"

I heard Lia scoff beside me in the dining hall as our conversation was cut short.

I turned around to see an attractive guy standing behind me.

"Uh, hi?"

"Hi! Uh...I'm Soobin. We're in the same music composition class?"

"Oh."

Lia eyed the both of us.

"Um...I have an extra ticket to Sarah Chang's concert. Want to come?"

God damn it. Sarah Chang is one of my favorite violinists.

"Uh...just the two of us?"

"Yeah...I got front row seats of the balcony at Carnegie Hall!"

Argh! That's the best place to sit.

"What do you say?" He flashed an enthusiastic smile.

"Uh...."

I turned to make eye contact with Lia to signal for help but she was eating her food.

"Um...sure?"

"Yes! Can I get your number? I'll text you the concert information and pick you up that day."

"Ok..." I gave him my number and watched as he excitedly walked away.

"I turned back to face Lia, who had an annoyed expression.

"Seriously?"

"What?"

"You're just going to go on a date with a random
guy you don't even know??"

"It's not a date and also, Sarah FREAKING Chang will be there."

"I can't believe you, Yeji."

"Wh- hey! You would have done the same if it were Mitsuko Uchida performing."

"Ugh, whatever."