i used to say that i admired you
i used to blame it on my nerves
i used to be happy with all that we had until it wasn't enough to be friends
i thought that meant that i hated you
or grew out of our history
so i turned my back on your tired brown eyes and prayed for these feelings to end
time passed, and with it, opportunity
you tried to reach out a hand
but i denied it with cold words and thoughtless dismissals and ignored the need to mend
i realize now it was none of those things
as i read and reread your words
searching for a confession i know i won't find; pretending it's fine to pretend
these feelings i have, you already know
i've told you those words before
but you don't know how much i mean it when i say i'll love you until the end
