Vessel

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Hollowed out and numb
Unfeeling to everything
Yet a nerve struck with constant pain
A numb pain.
Is that possible?
Cold and tired and dreary
And numb.
Can't feel you there
But still striving to be like you
Because your words have left blood stains on my mind and heart
Not classy enough.
Not white enough.
Not old money enough.
One by one I'm unpicking each stitch
To open and undo every old wound
To clean an infected, infested vessel
To offer a salve and a numbing so sweet
Hoping with each new day, I am more of me
And less of you.

--- Ink and Wander

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