Departure

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For about the next week or so I felt drained. Like all the blood had been sucked out of me and I was just a pale, exhausted, stick of bones. But obviously on the outside I looked as hard as steel, which got some compliments from the boys that were shut down verbally and physically. I had woken up that morning wanting to just crawl under the blankets of the bed, but not because it was warm. And right now I am recklessly bringing down a tree for the firewood. I volunteered to do it because a. no one else wanted to, and b. I thought it would help me vent. It definitely did, my machete hacking the trunk to pieces and my face scrunching with anger and fear and sadness and guilt and every bad feeling you could ever have. I pulled back eventually and felt a little bit better, even though my hair was sticking to me and my armpits were all sweaty. Once I had chopped the smaller end up and carried it back, I grabbed a tarp and covered the rest of the tree. I had just finished when I heard a loud voice coming from the direction of the circle.

I followed the voice and discovered many others doing the same. 'Fuck' I swore under my breath as I realised who it was. 'Friends! I have called you here today to expose the person many of you call a leader, yet again. I recently made a discovery, of what some may call an insignificant. little. diary. But when I looked through the pages, I was shocked! Shocked that this person decided to hide something from us for the millionth time! And shocked at what this little book held. This journal, gentlemen and lady, is the entire childhood story, of a miss Ambrose! You must be thinking, who is that? Well, how about we let her tell us herself?' He mockingly invited me to come stand beside him. And let me tell you now, you do not want to be messing with me while I'm holding a weapon. But I confidently strode into the centre, knowing all eyes were on me. I snatched the book from Kaiden's hands, and held it up above my head. 'The reason why I did not share my personal life with you is because I was, and still am processing it. I don't want what I know to be burdened on the rest of you, but if you must, come and get it!' I yelled, and waited. I waited for everyone to come barrelling at me, trying to get even a glimpse at the girls diary. I knew I was going to have to fight them off, and I steeled myself in preparation. Even though I hadn't eaten properly since what happened, and I hadn't trained with anyone but Ax and Val, I was sure I could still take them all. But I was left waiting. Left standing in the middle of the circle, a diary held high over my head, with 28 boys surrounding me. 

Kaiden stepped forward, aiming to take the diary from out of my grasp. I twisted out of the way, dropped the book to the floor and grabbed his extended arm. I jabbed my other hand under his ribs and while he was curled over, I grabbed his head and pulled it down to my lifted knee. I heard him groan before he passed out on the ground, and I ran. I picked up my diary and sprinted over to my bed. I yanked the sack that I had prepared earlier out from under my stretcher, checked I had everything I needed, and headed out for the doors. The others had all caught up by the time I reached the maze entrance, minus Armando and Chevy who I guessed were taking care of Kaiden. 'What the hell are you doing Nyla?' Alvaro exclaimed. I stood up straight, catching my breath. 'I've decided to go. I probably won't come back, and I'm not asking any of you shanks to come with me, but I'm going. I need to know that this isn't all that's left. And the death of my best friend was enough to convince me to go. So I guess this is goodbye' I said with a small wave of my hand. 'I'm coming, obviously' Ax and Val said in unison. I let a broken laugh escape as they stared at each other and raced each other back to the shelters to grab their things. Another figure emerged from the crowd, the nurse who helped everyone and still managed to have a sense of humour. "You coming too Hunter? I thought there were a bunch of dead plants that needed your attention." I teased, surprised that I could even attempt to be funny. He nodded towards me then walked back to the med hut, no doubt to get the supplies we would all need.  'And naturally I have to come as well. You are my sister and there has to be some law about following her to doom' Nolan announced, stepping forward. I nodded my head to him with watery eyes and a grin, knowing that this was a huge sign of his love. Then surprisingly, Alvaro spoke up. 'I might die, but I think I have a better chance of survival with you guys' and ran off to grab his things too. And then lastly, Koa and Evander moved forward, bracing each other with their arms. 'Can we come too?' They said timidly. I stared right at them and said 'You guys know the consequences. But I would love it if you came.' and they ran to the shelters. 

Once everyone was all back, we assembled in front of the doors again and turned to face everyone else. I had Valentino, Nolan and Koa on my left, and Axel, Evander, Hunter and Alvaro on my right. There was a lot of main character energy surrounding me, and the adrenaline coursing through my veins inspired me to make my closing speech. I stepped forward a little, directly facing a frowning Kaiden, who had returned from the med hut. Lifting his chin up and unfolding his arms for him, I whispered into his ear, "I don't know if you consider this a win or not, but I'm not leaving you in charge. Good luck Kaid" And I kissed his cheek. Kind of a hail master moment, I know. I stood back and raised my voice so everyone could hear. "I know I'm not your leader anymore, and I was kind of a bitch. But hopefully if you don't agree with the leader I have chosen, you do it wisely. Patton is in charge, because he has outstanding leadership qualities and everyone loves him. Any last words guys?" I turned to the others in question. They all shook their heads except Axel, who added on to what I was saying with, "Look, I get how scary this might seem. And yeah, we might die. But honestly I would rather die out there than stay in here where I can smell Wyatt's armpits." After a few chuckles he continued,  "But on a serious note, you can all come wth us. Safety in numbers right?" And he paused, staring out at the worried faces. And one angry face, who interrupted Axel. "Stop spreading that bullshit. It's not like all of you are going to make it out of here, and why listen to her? We have no reason to trust that anything she said is true, what with all the lies she's told since day one. If you really want to survive past today, you'll stay. And if you leave, you aren't welcome back." He finished, the cocky look on his face returning. Except everyone around Kaiden started slowly shuffling away from him, and towards someone else. Patton. They had chosen, and Kaiden didn't even realise until the very last moment. 

Quite a funny thing to witness, a boy who thinks he has it all under control realising that the control has been taken. Poetic, even. Once we all had watched him stomp his way back to his bed, we made our move. But not straight through the doors. We marched over to the wall. The wall that was carved with all the names of people who travelled and lived in this square they called home. I kept my eyes from looking at Callan's name, and drew them to my own. I didn't draw a line through it, since I hadn't died. But what I did do, was pick up some rock, and drew a circle around my name. A tear in my eye, I passed the rock to Nolan, who did the same. Once we were all done, we were ready to go. It was almost lunch time, and the sun was high in the sky. We were all about to either die, or find out what life is.

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