Eve

13

I had found myself running off, forgetting all about the stupid drinks and allowing stupid tears to gush down my flustered cheeks. I had to get away. I had to get away from the crowd and the festivals and especially the sight before me. It made me sick remembering it in my head. Like the feeling a partner was cheating on you, even though this "partner" was just a fantasy in my head.

I sat on a bench beside the shore of the lagoon, trying to muffle the sounds of cheering people and loud music. I wanted it all to stop. I wanted to freeze time and go back to where I never even offered to get Eve a drink. Or did I? Was it good I was reminded I would never be as close to Eve as Milo was?

I hated how my tears wouldn't stop. Had I been holding this in for so long? Had I been so clueless that reality hadn't hit me yet? When would I realize I was in love with someone I could never have? Eve doesn't love me back the same way. She never will. I know this because I know she loves Milo. The way she smiles to him, laughs, talks to him. It's all different. It's different than how she talks to me. She talks to Milo the same way I talk to her. A way only someone so deeply in love would speak to their crush. 

I can't even deny how perfect they are for each other and it makes me enraged. Oh what I would give to be in his shoes and see how that feels. To see how it feels to be loved by Eve romantically.

I didn't know how long it had been that I was sitting on that bench until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I festival sounds finally went away when I saw it was Eve. Everything seemed to suddenly go away. And I hated that. I hated how comfortable she made me feel just by her presence.

"What's wrong, Lena? You never brought the drinks back so I got worried. I've been looking for you everywhere," she sat down beside me on the bench, tilting her head slightly as she looked over to me.

I wiped my eyes, even though it was no use trying to hid how puffy my face had become, "It's nothing." I couldn't tell her the truth. If I did, I knew what I'd be risking. And I couldn't loose the bond Eve and I had built up all this time.

"You really won't tell me?" 

I shook my head, "I'm sorry. It's really nothing. Just stupid stuff."

"Just 'stupid stuff', huh? That's some real stupid stuff if it's making you cry this hard," Eve sighed, her hand glided over my back rubbing it softly.

I forced a smile, sucking up the feelings that I had only moments ago, "Eve, I'm fine. Guess I'm just emotional tonight."

Eve gave up at that. I guess she did know when it was time for her to give up her stubbornness and let go. She always knew what was right.

"C'mere," Eve stood, taking my hand.

"Where are you taking me," I asked, still glued onto the bench, feeling tired from the emotional drainage.

"Just trust me," Eve rolled her eyes, prying me off the seat. She tugged me down the beach, throwing off her sandals and letting loose her hair from its bun. I followed her because I did trust her. I trusted her with my life. So I did the same, kicking off my shoes and starting to run with her. I followed her lead, watching as her dress and hair rippled in the wind behind her.

"It's so hot tonight, right?" Eve exclaimed, looking back to me, "Let's go for a swim!"

She was pulling me into the lagoon, not caring as my clothes became soaked along with hers. I knew she didn't care because she'd do anything for someone in need. That was one of the most beautiful things about her. And it worked. I had already forgotten about any other care in the world. The only thing that mattered was here and now. 

Waist deep in, we splashed at each other. Giggling and laughing in the bright gleam of the moonlight and the faint light coming from the festival. It was truly amazing just being here like this. Even better than any part of the festival. Seeing Eve like this, smiling and laughing, her dress soaked to her skin. It made my stomach erupt in butterflies. 

This is when I had to admit it was okay that Eve didn't love me back the same way I loved her. The only thing I can do now is treasure moments like this with Eve, even if she was only a friend. I have to push away what pain I feel when I snap back to reality. Where's the point in dreading over something you can't change? I need to appreciate what I have already.