Forbidden Love

Part 20

Adam's POV

It was January 3rd and Y/n was due in 12 days. The nursery was ready. My parents were excited. Y/n was finally letting go of her parents and she even got close to Connie and Julie again. Everything was going perfect. I look over to see my beautiful fiancé sleeping peacefully. I decided to get up and make her some breakfast. I threw on some shorts and a sweatshirt and head to the kitchen. My parents went back to work so it was just her and I. I made pancakes, bacon, and eggs for her. She's been eating a lot of bacon for breakfast lately. It's not very good for her but she gets mean when she doesn't get what she wants so I do whatever she says.

"Mmm smells amazing." I hear Y/n say behind me and I hand her a plate. "Here ya go!" She kisses me and begins to eat. I make myself and plate and sit across from her at the breakfast nook. "So whats on the agenda today? Movies? Shows? Or YouTube?" I ask. Her and I usually only watched one of the three categories a day. Only because it just happened to happen that way. "Definitely shows. I'm in a 'Friends' kind of mood" she smiles with her cheeks full of pancakes and the smile instantly fades. Her face goes scared. "Baby? What's wrong?" I ask and her face eases up. "Hm I dunno. I'm just uncomfortable I guess." She shrugs and continues eating. I definitely need to keep an eye on her today. She could have the baby any second now.

After we ate we sat on the couch and watched friends for a while. Every so often I'd look over at her and I could tell she was in pain but when I asked she just brushed it off. "I'm gonna go pee" she said and gets up. I wait for her to close the door before I listen in. I just want to make sure she's fine. I hear her grunting and wincing so I open the door. She's hunched over holding her belly. I don't hesitate to call my parents and I grab the hospital bag and hold Y/n up. "No Adam- stop." I look at her confused and she lifts her dress up. Something was coming out of her but I didn't want to worry her. I mean she knew but I didn't want to stress her out more. "Y/n i have to take you to the hospital." She nods and I hold her up and take her to the car. She collapses in the back seat and I haul ass to the hospital. We got there in only a few minutes. When I got out I went inside to get somebody and there came out with a wheelchair. I grab the bag and help Y/n up. "Oh no" I hear one of the nurses say and I instantly freak out and so does she "What do you mean 'oh no'!?" Y/n yells and the bring out a gurney. "Her umbilical cord is coming out putting the baby in distress. I'm sorry honey but I have to...put my hand up there. And it's gonna hurt." She says and shoves her hand in. Y/n screams in pain. And I'm talking bloody murder. I felt so useless so I held her hand and talked her her. "She's bleeding! Get her up to an O.R.!" Someone yells and they take her away. "O.R.?? What?" I yell and follow them leaving my car for valet.

I run after her and I see she's losing blood. "We gotta get this baby out now!" Someone yells. When we get up to the O.R. they put on this things in and on her. She's barely conscious. "Adam...I love you- so much." Her voice cracks and I begin to cry. "Don't do that Y/n. You're gonna be fine! I promise." I hold her hand and kiss her. "You can only be in here for the birth but once the baby is out, so are you." A doctor says and I nod. "Please make sure he doesn't become on of those weird kids that nobody likes. And I want him to do hockey just like you." She manages to get out. "You're going to be here for all of that, okay? So stop acting like you won't be." I look up and see them cutting into her to get the baby out. And then...I heard cries. Our baby boy Julian's cries. "You guys have a beautiful perfectly healthy baby boy!" Someone smiles and places him on her chest. "Hi Julian! Hi baby, I'm your mommy" she coos at him but he gets taken away to get cleaned off and they do what they gotta do with him. "Dad, we need you out now." A doctor says and I kiss Y/n goodbye. "I love you Adam." She cries. "Stop it, okay. You're going to be okay..." I look up at a doctor who's giving me a look. A 'Say your goodbyes' look. And my heart sinks. I begin to choke up. "I love you Y/n. You're my soulmate-" I get cut off my rapid beeping and I'm pulled out of the room. A nurse takes me to where my son is and I text my parents where I'm at.

Soon they come up to Y/n's room where she's coming post op and Julian and I are just laying doing that chest to chest thing, I don't know. "Ohh wow. Look at him!" My mom starts to cry and my dad hugs her. "Wait" he starts "where's Y/n?" He asks and my mom looks around the room. I start to sob. "She's in surgery. There were complications and they don't know if she'll be okay." I sob and my mom takes the baby as I collapse in my dads arms. "They told me to say my goodbyes" I've never cried like this. I felt like I was dying too.  Couldn't breathe or see or hear. It felt like my heart was going to stop any minute now.

I decided to text the group chat and tell everyone what was going on. They all came to the hospital to see us and we all just sat in the room making small talk about the baby and Y/n. We hadn't had any updates on her, and it felt like that wasn't a good thing. Soon enough someone comes through the door. "Mr. Banks?" I stand up and walk to the doctor. "We did everything we could but she had prolapse umbilical cord and which is usually life threatening to only the baby but when we tried to push the cord back in she began to bleed and eventually bled out. I'm so sorry for your loss." She then walks out.

I break down on the floor and cry. I cry and yell and cry some more. I was angry at myself. 'Why didn't I bring her to the hospital sooner?' 'Why didn't I tell her she shouldn't keep it?' 'Why did we have to have sex?' "I can't do it." I sob and Charlie comes over to me. "Look at me Adam. Yes you can. We're all here for you and god doesn't give you more than you can handle" he says which confuses me because he's not religious but whatever. "He has no mom." My mom shakes her head. "Yes he does, she's still his mommy." I cry even more.

She'll never get to really hold him. She'll never get to feed him. She'll never get to bring him home. She'll never get to hear his first laugh or see his first steps or hear his first words. She won't get to experience all of this with me like she was supposed to. She'll never get to do the one thing she wanted to do most in the world; be a mom. All she ever did was tell me about how excited she was to get married and have a family and now she won't get to have that. She left thinking it was only her, I, and the baby. We were the only ones she felt loved by. But that's not the case, we all love her but she'll never get to understand that. I don't know if I can go in without her.

A different doctor comes in and asks if I want to see her and I say yes. She takes me to an empty kind of dark cold room with her body laying there on a table. She still had her bump, it was just a bit smaller. She looked so...unreal. Like she didn't even exist before. I looked at her hand to see the manicure she got a couple days ago and her ring. Her damn ring. I couldn't even look at it, it just made me even more sad. I'll never get to marry the one person I felt safest and happiest with.

"Y/n. We're going to be okay. I'll make sure to put him in hockey and I won't let him be a weird kid at school. I'll make sure he stands up for himself and doesn't let anyone bully him. I'll make sure to tell him about you every day and show him pictures of you, and us, and us with our friends. I'll make sure he knows just how amazing you are and that he's the luckiest boy to have you as a mom. Don't worry about us.
We love you.