amenity

chapter 19

haruto went inside the grey and gloom building in which his apartment was. he lived alone, as a foreign student from japan. his parents sent him to south korea the moment they found about the prime school he was currently attending to. the boy had to deal with all the difficulties alone. the beginnings were the worst – he struggled with korean a lot, he didn't have a decent apartment from the start and it was hard for him to approach anybody, so he had no friends.

that's why he became so cold and harsh. he preferred to distant himself than get mocked by others. they would make fun of his broken korean, current poor financial state, and so on. after some months he met junkyu, his present best friend, and they got on well only thanks to junkyu and how he just stuck to the other, not letting him sit alone at a class.

haruto was thankful for junkyu, but he has never said that to him.

he sighed as he went up the stairs. the walls he passes by every day seemed to have even more dust and dirt on them than usual. his head was throbbing, as it couldn't stop replaying a sight of his favorite boy and how disappointed and sad he was due to what haruto had done this morning. his face twitched a little as he started blaming and scolding himself again.

"you are the worst that could ever happen to him." a voice kept on repeating. "you don't deserve him. he is too good for you, and would never love you back."

when he was almost in front of the door of his apartment, he reached for the bag on his back and started digging there in search of keys.

when he was all immersed in this task, his foot suddenly met with something on the floor.

"what the..."

he trailed off the moment his eyes saw a familiar figure. right there on the floor, leaned against his door, was a boy.

the boy covered with a pink blanket haruto made.

"y-yedam."

haruto muttered in disbelief. his sight became blurry, he immediately gave up on searching for the keys. he slowly crouched down, very quietly as if scared that he will make too much commotion. he extended his hand and gently caressed yedam's cheek.

his favorite boy was truly there. it wasn't just a mirage. he was there, with his eyes closed and breath regular. he must have fallen asleep while waiting for him.

it was already dark outside since haruto decided not to go to his apartment immediately this night. at first, he was so desperate that he wanted to get drunk at some nearby pub, but eventually, he just spent some time walking around the city. and only when he was fed up with all the noise from the streets and opened shops which managed to muffle his fretful thoughts, he took a route home.

"why are you here, hm?" he murmured, still stroking the other's fair skin. "it is all true. i do not deserve you."

after a momentary silence, whilst he was just admiring his favorite boy's perfect details, he finally found his keys, and holding yedam tight in his arms, one hand under his back and the other below his knees, went inside the apartment.

he put his prince on the bed, adjusted the blanket which moved slightly and sat down next to him.

he couldn't stop looking at him, so this is how he has spent the next hour. from time to time touching his soft cheeks, or gingerly ruffling his hair. everything he did was so meek and barely palpable so that his beloved wouldn't wake up.

because haruto was afraid that once yedam wakes up, he will run away and haruto will be left alone again.

// ✧ //