Burning Up

Heartache

I almost didn't know where I was headed until I found myself standing before the brick walls and large windows of the restaurant, tears still fresh in my eyes.

I didn't want to see Sami, or Luis, or even Valeria in all honesty, but as I entered the building, I knew I had made the right decision. After all, there's no room for teenage heartbreak in business, right?

Despite my detour I was still fairly early, and only a few customers were scattered around the tables, enjoying either a very late lunch or a shockingly early dinner. I was glad that there weren't many people and hurried towards the bathroom to freshen up as quickly as possible.

As I looked in the mirror, I was almost shocked to see that it was in fact my own face staring back at me. I felt as though it should be someone else's, as though my heart break should be reflected in my reflection in more ways than just puffy eyes.

I sighed, moving to splash some water over my face before dabbing away the smudged mascara and excess water that had trickled down my cheeks. It was strange that my eyes almost looked more alive now that there was a sheen of liquid heartbreak covering them, as though for the past few months I'd been locked in some sort of trance.

"Suck it up Mila." I muttered.

Giving myself one final once over in the mirror, I took a deep breath and headed out the bathroom door, tying my apron around my waist as I went, ignoring the painful lump in my throat.

I'd barely made it out the door when I bumped into Valeria who turned quickly, grabbing me by the biceps to stop both of us from falling.

"I'm so sorry!" I gasped, struggling for a moment to steady myself.

"Mila?" She said, a slight frown passing across her features. "What are you doing here? Sami said that you left."

"Oh, no." I lied, purposely avoiding her gaze. "I left my phone at home and wanted to get it before my shift. I get nervous walking home in the dark." I laughed uncomfortably, knowing that she wouldn't believe me before glancing up at her, praying that she would let my lie slip.

Relief flooded my system as she nodded, but the soft smile that passed across her lips suggested that Sami must've told her what happened and the part of me that was still angry scowled in resentment for her pity.

It was strange how easily I resumed my work after that. At first, I'd felt distant and strange, as though I was watching myself smile and laugh at all the right intervals, but never quite feeling the connection between my thoughts and actions, but as the hours past I found myself chatting with regulars with my normal enthusiasm, genuinely enjoying the stories they told me and the jokes they made each time I returned to their tables. It was the best form of distraction, and I was almost able to forget what had happened just hours before.

Almost.

It was difficult to ignore Sami's concerned glances as I worked. He was a constant reminder of what was going on in the outside world, like a needle sat threateningly close to a balloon. I didn't want to think about what had happened earlier, the constant doubts I knew I would have over what I should've said, how I should've said it. I didn't want to think about whether Iago would still be there when I got home.

So, for the next five hours I ignored everyone and everything that didn't concern my job. I smiled and laughed, going backwards and forwards between the kitchen, the bar, and the tables as I fetched things with an efficiency that almost rivalled the speed at which things were being ordered.

It was nice, almost as though things were passing in a dream.

It was only after I wished the last remaining customers good night that I realised just how exhausted I was. My cheeks had begun to ache from their constant grinning and my eyelids had grown heavy, still sore and slightly swollen from the hours before.