apocalypse

Tears

Songs: Each Time You Fall In Love - Cigarettes After Sex, No Time To Die - Billie Eilish, and Where's My Love (Alternate Version) - SYML

Hajime turned around, looking at his back in the mirror at the branded crown. It still hadn't healed after a week, the skin red and irritated around the black outline.

He looked in the mirror at himself, his hair still dripping from his shower. Iwaizumi hardly recognized himself. His eyes were sunken with a lack of sleep. He never ate, and when he did, it often came right back up. He could tell his body was weakening, his ribs showing under his skin.

The events of the last week had gone by in a mindless blur. In an effort to forget that horrifying night, he had rarely thought about anything at all.

Kuroo had tried his best to comfort him. He showed him his own brand, telling him that the pain would go away soon. He made him and Tooru coffee every morning before he went to work, and he checked on them as soon as he got home. Iwaizumi found the gestures endearing, but no amount of coffee could erase those terrible memories.

A soft knock on the door pulled Iwaizumi out of his thoughts. "Hey, Iwa? Are you almost done in there?" Bokuto yelled from outside.

Iwaizumi opened the door, not even bothering to put on a fake smile for Bokuto. "Yeah. Sorry," he said, pushing past him.

"Wait, Iwaizumi," Bokuto said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "How are you?"

Hajime felt his chest heave, and he tried not to cry. "I'm okay."

"I don't believe you. I know how traumatizing it is to go through what you did. All of us do. If you ever need someone to talk to about it, you can talk to any of us. It may not seem like it sometimes, but we all care about you," he said, giving Hajime a small smile.

Iwaizumi's words felt stuck in his throat, and he began to cry. It was the first time he had shed tears since that night. "I know, and I'm thankful for that. I just don't think I can talk to anyone about it right now. Not even Tooru."

"I understand," Bokuto said. "Get some rest. I think Oikawa is already asleep in there, so be quiet." He smiled again before closing the bathroom door behind him.

Iwaizumi wiped his tears away before going back to his room, not wanting Oikawa to see them if he was still awake.

"Iwaizumi, are you crying?" Tooru said, sitting up. He had scarcely left the bed much less brush his hair or shower. He looked incredibly sick, his eyes lined with dark circles and tear stains.

Hajime shook his head. "No. I'm fine," he said, turning off the lamp and laying down beside him.

"I've known you long enough, Iwa. I know when you're lying to me," he said, resting his head down on his pillow.

They hadn't talked about what happened with Nakashi, but Iwa knew it haunted them both. He had heard what Oikawa had said to Nakashi, but he was too preoccupied to deal with it. Even though Tooru's words were clear in his mind, his own confessions evaded him. He was almost certain that Oikawa hadn't heard what he had said after drinking that liquid, but he couldn't be completely sure.

"I'm sorry, Tooru. I just don't know what's wrong with me right now," Iwaizumi admitted, his voice shaking.

Oikawa's hand slipped through the sheets, his fingers running tentatively over Iwaizumi's. His touch sent shocks up Hajime's arm. "Don't ever feel like you need to hide your tears from me. I hate the face you make when you feel like crying alone. It's okay to let go in front of me," Tooru said. He laced their fingers together, rubbing his thumb in circles over Iwaizumi's.